5 August 2007

I can feel love sometimes. It manifests itself in many ways as H and I live together and although I know he loves me all the time, sometimes, I feel it too.

As you know we’ve both been sick with colds or flu, or whatever it is. I get asthma too so I have to be careful as my asthma is always worse when I get any respiratory tract infection. Luckily we’re both pretty healthy and I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve been sick in the past ten years.

I haven’t been strong enough to do much over the past few days. H made sure I’ve been sitting either on the front verandah, in the lounge room or next to the bedroom window with the sun pouring in. He’s been bringing me glasses of water, cups of tea and soup and cut up pieces of fruit. To me, peeling and cutting someone’s fruit for them is an act of love. It’s been with me since forever and I always associate it with being cared for and nourished.

He’s listening to my breathing too. Just like I did last week when he was sick, and I listened to his. I wonder if he thinks of us aging, like I did, and that we’re getting older now. When I start wheezing at night, he wakes me up with my asthma puffer and while I organise myself with it, he gets some lemon and honey tea, and then we settle back into our warm bed together again. I know he’s been covering me up too. I have a habit of throwing off the quilt, but he keeps retrieving it to make sure I stay warm. I know what he’s doing, but he doesn’t know I know. : )

This love we’ve grown through our marriage is like an old sourdough starter that’s been developing its flavours for years. Those flavours are complex and delicate, yet robust enough to last through time. When I was young I didn’t know that love matured and changed through the years, but it does. As we change, so does the expression of our love. This is unlike the young love of a new marriage, it’s confident, softer and mellowed.

The first thing he asks each morning is “how are you feeling today?” I want to say “I’m feeling love” but I tell him, “I’m ok” instead. It’s a wonderful thing to find someone who will look after you as a mother would and who maintains a loving and patient attitude not only when things are wonderfully bright and positive, but also when they’re not. It’s at those times I have more than the knowledge of love, I feel it too.

Hearts to all of you who drop by today. I hope you feel love in your life too.


  1. *This* is so beautiful! *You* are so precious. Thanks for sharing both your tender heart and the wonderfully practical of your lovely life, so freely and generously--I love how you see the one through the other. ((Rhonda Jean))
    Lovingly, your pal, Jewels

  2. What a beautiful, touching post! Hope you feel better soon. :)

  3. it is wonderful in this day and age that you have people who are happy in there long term lives is refreshing to communicate with people who share the ups and downs the good bad and trying times and love each other through it all.. it makes us all not take each other for granted to go the extra mile knowing that in the down times there is some one there who will do it for you ... get well soon happy days Margie

  4. Rhonda, take care and enjoy being cared for. Couples come to rely so much on each other over the years. Some say its taking each other for granted but I think it's more like being in tune with the other's soul and living a fuller life because of it.

  5. Elegantly written as always. I like the way you described the "cpmfortable" love that you and H share. Get well soon.

  6. Hi Rhonda
    It sounds like you and H have a lovely thing going there! Hope you feel better soon.


  7. Beautiful and poignant. I again find your posting relevant and may read it out to my partner. I think it might be a common thing for women, but sometimes we need to feel and not just know that we are loved. I have been trying to communicate this to my partner that I need to feel his love and it has got to the stage where I cannot go no further unless I feel his love!! Anyway,as he loves me reading to him (english is his second language), I think I will read your little reflection to him.
    Hope you feel better soon.

  8. Yet another touching post Rhonda. Thank you for sharing your heart. I hope I can say the same about DH and I down the track.

    I am totally in love with my DH and he's my best friend as well. Each year I'm sure we get closer - even though it hardly seems possible (we've been married 11 years). I didn't get well looked after at times when I was a child but he sure looks after me well now!!! I feel truly blessed and hope that in some way I bless his life as well.

    Hope you're feeling better soon.

  9. Oh Rhonda you have left me all misty eyed reading that and thinking of my dear man whom I will marry on the 30th of November as you know.
    I think that love does grow as time goes on and yes I believe that you do feel the love.
    Hugs to the both of you

  10. We have more in common than you know!. My DH is ever so thoughtful of me and he helps me slow down when breathing is a problem. As we have grown older together our love has grown deeper and freer and easier. Great post. Jan

  11. What a wonderful post! Very touching...Found your blog via Shropshire Girl and what a find! There are so many posts on your blog that I can identify with and will enjoy reading through. I have wanted to make soap for awhile now and also sourdough both of which are on your blog. Thanks so much for making my day!


  12. This is a lovely post Rhonda.
    I have been married 29 years next month(I can hardly believe it's been that long!)and I am more in love now than ever. I feel loved everyday and often tell my dh this. He told me once long ago that he was not a mind reader and if I had something to say I had to tell him, so I do.
    Over the years our love has grown and changed we are comfortable and content in each others company. I think the greatest gift you can give your children is to love their father.
    I am 46 and dh is 47 so we could have another 50 years together!!!!!!!!
    We laugh together everyday and I look forward to growing old with my main squeeze :)

  13. Thanks for all those lovely comments. I'm feeling much better today and will be going to work later. Hopefully I'll have the time, now that I have the energy, to respond to your comments. : )

  14. I think this is the sweetest post I've come across in Blogland :)

    and I believe your image of love as a sourdough bread starter will stay with me for the rest of my life...

    thanks :)

  15. Hi Rhonda Jean,
    Beautiful post. Now that Dave and I are starting to age we are finding out how much we really do need each other.We are becoming more aware of the changes growing old brings with it.

  16. this posting got me to thinking today about the different ways that people demonstrate love. how the way that one person demonstrates love doesn't always match up to how another person needs to receive love. how wonderful when two people can transmit their signals of love to the needs of each other!

  17. that is so very ought to show your man this post..he'd love it.
    Sounds like he loves you a whole lot. As you do him.
    I hope that you both get to feeling better real soon.

  18. thank you, each and every one of you.

    Garden goose, H and I use the same computer so he does read my blog every so often. I never show him individual posts but he reads here when he's in the mood for it. He's even referred to himself as "H" recently when we had some friends visiting. LOL

  19. What a beautiful post :)

  20. Lovely. Absolutely lovely. My husband and I were married last December, and he's been off in Iraq for most of that time. For the time we had together though, we were learning the beginnings of what you described here. I was physically disabled, and he was very thoughtful in how he treated me-not just trying to keep me safe, but realizing when I 'needed' to do something a bit reckless, like trying rock climbing even though I couldn't walk afterwards. *laughs*

    Thank you for reminding me of that, now when I need it most! :)




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