13 June 2008

There is balance in most healthy systems


I want to carry on from my post about tightening your belt because there are more important things to consider. Yesterday I wrote about the containment of spending and conservation of money but I didn't write about where that will lead you.

That post needs to be balanced by one about the enjoyment and enrichment to be found in living within your means. There is balance in most healthy systems.

There may be several things you don't like doing in a simplified life, but there will be many things that make up for that, and they will probably be those elements you didn't or couldn't notice when you were living faster and bigger. When you slow down, you'll start noticing the small and quiet parts of your life that went unseen before. You may be surprised at how you feel when you bake a good loaf of bread for the first time or when you put your home made soap in the bathroom for the family to use. Inviting a friend around for coffee and homemade scones instead of meeting at the local Starbucks will keep you in touch with your friends and show them, but example, that you don't have to be waited on and have everything made for you. You are capable, you can do for yourself and you don't have to spend money in the process. These small actions are significant, they mark your change and they often bring joy.

One of the first things I did when I slowed down and starting living well was to be mindful of what I was doing. I stopped multi-tasking to get things done fast and concentrated on the one thing I was doing. I sometimes found this difficult because my mind was racing to get to the next, the next, the next, until I accidentally came up with a strategy that worked for me, and is still working. When I do something I like, when there is something to be savoured, when there is a new feeling, I stop and tell myself aloud: "this is really beautiful" or "I LOVE this" or "that feels lovely" or "this is a good thing". It marks the moment as a special one, I hear the affirmation, I remember it because it is verbalised and it slows me down. There is beauty lurking in the mundane things that surround you, you just need to slow down enough to find it. Of course there will be times when you'll find joy and meaning in a great occasion but sometimes you'll find the same meaning in the sound of your own breathing.

You may think that not shopping and staying home more will be tedious but use your time at home to make it a place you want to be. Your home is not just a box you sleep in. It's the space you truly relax in, it's the safe haven where you raise your children, it's where you express love, it's where you keep what you need to live, it's where you grow older and wiser. Such an important place should be warm and supportive of the people who live there. There are no benevolent pixies who will come in and make it a place you will feel at home in. That is your job. You must make your home the place you want it to be and you will do that not by following what is in a glossy magazine or shop window, but instead by following what is in your heart. Make do with what you already have to fluff your nest and make your home a unique place that reflects the person you are now.

So if you're on your transition from a life lived more outside yourself to one that is within you and around you, slow down, then slow down more, be aware of what you have and don't forget to tell yourself: this is good for me. Use your free time making your home the place you want it to be. If you have to sew or create what you need, what's stopping you?

This post is to remind you that the full story of tightening your belt is not all doom and gloom. It is balanced by the joy you will find when you do it. I hope you know now that by stepping away from what mainstream society has become you will discover how you fit into your own life and your environment. You're entering a period of conservation so remember that whatever you need to fluff your nest is probably already in your home. You are cutting back, becoming independent and are starting to provide for yourself. You don't need to buy another plastic thingamajig, you don't need one more thing that's been shipped from China or India. Use what you have, appreciate who you are now and tighten that belt. Start reskilling, recycling, reusing, renewing and regenerating, and you'll reinvent and rediscover yourself in the process.

It's all waiting for you, my friends.
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