I want to die happy

Dying happy

Homemaking attracts people from all walks of life, with differing wants, needs, philosophies and ambitions. I have a degree, a moderate amount of quiet success in small business and, regrettably, a personal history of waste and overspending. But I had an epiphany of sorts many years ago and since then my aim was to create a safe, comfortable and loving home for Hanno and everyone who visits us here. I'm glad I made the changes I did all those years ago because I have grandchildren now and the sense of all we're doing here is crystal clear to me. I think that my history focused me like a laser beam on my home because over spending, waste and living in a disordered home made me unhappy. We only have the pleasure of living in a beautiful and secure home if we put the time and effort in to create it. Nothing is handed to us on a silver platter and most of us have the opportunity to not only work for a living but to also work for the kind of life we want to live.  I want to be comfortable and content in my final years, I want an interesting life because I have more time to enjoy my days now and I want to die happy.  We all want that, don't we?



When I first came home, I wasn't really sure what to do, so I tried to do it all. I remembered how things were as I grew up and my days were full of home production, growing food, storing and preserving, mending, creating and serving delicious food in an atmosphere of fluffy, calm comfort. It was very self conscious and focused at first. I've mellowed a lot and relaxed into it now, everything flows and I have much more time to enjoy the process and breathe in fresh air.  I smile a lot, especially when no one else is around.



I think I'm very fortunate to have had the upbringing I did, the family I have, the education I had and that I took advantage of most of the opportunities that came my way. All that made me the person I am today. But when I look back and see where I've been and where I am now, I am am absolutely convinced that I'm here right now because I changed the way I think about money and possessions. And that is the opposite of what I grew up believing, which was that I, and everyone, were made happy by earning as much money as possible and then spending it on whatever we wanted.



I'm happier now than I've ever been and I'm grateful to have learned lessons that were often hidden and not talked about.  It takes a bit of digging and self belief, but the truth, your truth, is there. You just have to find it and believe it when you do, because it won't be the truth you expect and it won't be what everyone else is doing.

Is your story similar to mine? Do you think you're on that path now?

23 comments

  1. Thank you for making those Nice blogs. I love your way of living. They are very inspiring. Sorry for my Inglisch I am Dutch.

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  2. Rhonda, I just wanted to say that each week when I check into your blog I'm always instantly revived. When the week with small children and domestic life feels too overwhelming and the grind of housework sets in I am always reminded after reading your blog of why I believe so strongly in my life taking this direction and I am always comforted by this community which you have created for us on-line. Thank you for reminding me of the gently and nourishing rhythm of working in my home with my family.

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  3. Yes!! I totally agree and you have written it so wonderfully. Because I no longer work outside the home and overspend, I have had the pleasure of having my 4 year old grandson spend the week with me. Next week I'll have his 7 year old brother for the week. The 4 year old asked me this week 'Grandma, why do you hum a lot?' I smiled and replied 'because my heart is happy.' Yes it is!

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  4. Perhaps a similar path but not the same of course. I am very happy for you - and grateful for you (sharing your knowledge, journey, and encouragement.) At first, I wasn't sure what the result was supposed to look like. Now, there is a picture in my mind. I just had to get all that "stuff" so I could see more clearly. I'm now working towards it. Hope your day is beautiful.

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  5. hi, what a beautiful post you wrote. i completely agree with you! the wonder of life is quite far from waste and overspending!

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  6. To the point. Well to my point. I want to share my life with my family and friends and I don't feel pressured into participating in the Earn-spend-earn-Spend syndrome! Love and hugs to you dear friend.

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  7. What a lovely post Ronda. Yes, it is different for everyone. Not everyone we know or meet understands why or how we live on the road, that all the possessions we own are what we have with us in our caravan and tow vehicle and but mostly they don't understand how we could not have a HOUSE ......but they fail to comprehend that we do have a HOME. Big difference in my book.

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  8. I'm definitely on a new path. This post today gave me a sense of calm. Thank you again.

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  9. I'm on that path of simplicity myself Rhonda, and I receive much encouragement from following others who feel the way I do. Your words always encourage me - I'm realizing that I don't have to do it all, I don't have to have things perfect. I need to find the rhythm that works for me & my family. I'm learning to slow down, to be mindful of the tasks at hand and to focus on the things that I feel are most important - pushing aside the mental 'noise' of everything else. Thank you for your words of wisdom!

    ~Taylor-Made Homestead~

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  10. I lived the simple life for most of my life without really knowing that my way was different from anyone else. I have been told that I am a boring goody two shoes and that I am naive and belong in a different time then today, many people say I am quite old fashioned and I know I am but I really like my lifestyle. I have always enjoyed being a homemaker and proud of looking after my family.I love your blog and find it interesting that so many from all over the world are like minded. Often your words find a special place in my heart and I hope that you continue to share your thoughts with us for along time to come. Judi

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  11. Every time when I read a blog post from you I feel so happy, so quiet, so pure. And you inspire me a lot. This morning I was at a big shopping center and I didn't buy anything unnecessary. It was my inner voice , your voice that said to me, look at all those things, do I need them to be happy? And the answer was no, not at all. Back home I enjoyed a self prepared meal with homegrown vegetables and I feel so happy. Thank you for opening my eyes.

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    Replies
    1. Oh yes, a 'quietness' I agree absolutely!
      Ingrid

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  12. I am headed in that direction. I am working to age 60 by choice-financially I could retire now but I'm just not ready for that. My gardens are geared toward biointensive ability when I have the time. Right now I do simple plantings for winter storage. I have many creative hobbies. I have other things I want to learn once retired and will have the time to dedicate to learning well without undue stress.

    I have enjoyed your blog for many years and am so glad you continue to write and share with us. God Bless you and Hanno in this chapter of life.

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  13. A lovely blog post. I'm 73 and content with my lot. I'm thankful I live in this beautiful country of Australia, both my boys live in the same city as me (I am most thankful for that) I have good health, and if I hit a bump in the road I have a fine doctor.
    I pickle and make jam, I am learning about, and making, fermented food. I grow my own vegetables. I'm not ready to fall of the perch yet, but if it happens, yes, I'm happy.

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  14. The secret of a happy life: Gratitude, contentment and self reliance. And, of course, family. I have no need for grand things nor do I long to travel endlessly when I can make, grow and learn new things around the home.

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    Replies
    1. Could have been my words. So true!
      Ingrid

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    2. I just discovered this blog and am finding it very inspiring! I agree; I've been a homemaker since having my first child a decade ago and I have not felt bored for one minute. I love the freedom I have and the list of hobbies and skills I'd like to try just keeps growing. I'd rather be home than anywhere else in the world!

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  15. Great post Rhonda, as usual. Today I made a batch of your dog food recipe for my kelpie, Axel. It is his birthday today, a grand 14 years old. He lapped it up and now I am hoping his body likes it too lol.

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  16. Beautiful post - quite timely for us, as we near the 12 month mark since my husband gave up paid work to do the 'unpaid' work of home and child rearing. He absolutely loves what he is doing and does it very well, although with the cost of living in Auckland it is tempting for him to think of what he'll do to 'add value' when our youngest goes off to kindy. I just say 'you are already adding value!' but a lifetime of conditioning is a hard habit to break!

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  17. This post was just absolutely perfect. You really are an inspiration.
    MissFifi

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  18. I am very aware now that I'm happier with simple pleasures in my life. I have lost the desire to mindlessly shop. I'm a homebody and as much as I love and care for people I am most at peace pottering at home and keeping socialising to a minimum. Everyone is different and that's a good thing but I've learnt what makes me at ease.
    I'm renting until the end of the year and my husband and I are missing gardening. It truly soothes my soul.
    Home routines and rhythms give me an abundance of happiness. I feel safe and grounded. It puzzles some people but I am aware that at times they too puzzle me!
    Ingrid

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  19. We are definitely singing from the same hymn sheet, and do believe an ever increasing number of people are starting to adopt this lifestyle.

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  20. We live frugally as I'm worried what we are going to live on when we retire in about 12 years. But instead of feeling downtrodden, I am happily frugal. I've been though a lot of ups & downs and now at 52 I really appreciate our nice, simple life.

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