Simple Living Series - Finding happiness

Thank you all for your comments yesterday and for the links you left.  Some of them are known to me, some are not, but I'll check them out as soon as I can.  One recommendation that really should have been in my previous post was  Notes from the Frugal Trenches, a UK blog written by a young woman, that is full of excellent information. And she writes for the co-op!  Thanks Luisa.

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Sometimes there is no rhyme or reason, you just need certain things in your life.  Take pets, for instance.  If I were  living a strictly frugal life, cutting back at every opportunity, I wouldn't even consider having a pet dog or cat.  I would acknowledge the need to spend money on veterinary bills, I would know my animal would need good quality food and I would decide against getting a dog or cat.  However, I am not motivated by the need to be careful with money alone, there are other considerations.  I can't imagine my life without a dog in it.  I could live without a cat, and when Hettie dies she will not have a successor, but a dog is a different story.  When Alice dies, we will have another dog. I am certain of that. 

Buttermilk apple cake + black tea = morning tea happiness.

I believe strongly that we must all find our own happiness and part of my happiness is having a dog.  I know there is no reason to have a dog.  Our dogs are not working dogs, unless you call barking at strangers at the door working, nevertheless, they've been part of our home for many long years.  So why have a pet dog?  It's pure pleasure, they make us feel good, they give unconditional love and run around like mad bouncing clowns when we come home.  Who can resist that kind of wild joy?  Not me!

Everyday I mine my life for the pleasure it contains.  I want to live a life full of happiness, fulfilment and pure joy.  I look for it at every possibility, sometimes I find what I'm looking for, sometimes I find something deeper.  But I always look.  There is always the hope of finding treasure.

You have to do a lot of thinking when you live as we do.  You can't just coast through on automatic pilot because our lives are different to most.  We do more work so that has to be incorporated into each day in the most efficient way and you also want to feel good about it (most of the time).  Forget perfection, that only exists in the advertisements for products sitting on supermarket shelves.  Real life is flawed, but it is also beautiful and amazing.

Take knitting, for instance.  If you had never seen anyone knit, how could you imagine that a ball of wool and a couple of sticks could produce such wonderful and beautiful garments?  It's amazing.  I find joy and contentment in my knitting.  It's like a meditation - the repetition; stitch after stitch for row upon row.  Knitting makes me happy.

At the moment, when I look out my window, I see dawn's light slowly creeping into the sky.  It's not red, like it has been the past few weeks, it's grey and in front of the grey sky is a stand of pine trees that in the half light, looks like black filigree work.  I'm glad I looked up at the moment and found it lurking in my day because I know in ten minutes new light will replace it and it will look like what it is.

In the normal course of most days there will be many things that have the potential to make you happy if you look at them in a different way or with kinder eyes.  I know a lady in my own life who has no joy within her.  She sees most things in a negative way, thinks she is badly done by, always looks for, and expects, the worst in people and is generally a bit of a sadsack.  She never expects anything good to happen and consequently, it doesn't.  Her mean spirit turns people away from her and this just reinforces for her how bad life really is.  I believe that expecting goodness in each day and actively looking for and anticipating happiness makes you more aware of it and when those fleeting moments happen, you're ready and open for them to come into your life.

Don't expect blinding fireworks. I'm talking about all the small fragments of simple happiness that can be found in most days. Those big moments of happiness like the birth of a baby, a wedding, birthday parties, hearing "I love you" for the first time, or the ten thousandth, they are big things.  They're the easy ones.  But if you can look out for all those little bits that are scattered throughout the day, and collect them by acknowledging them, they will fill your basket to over flowing.  Acknowledgement is the key here - you have to notice and know what you've found.  Had I looked up this morning and seen a grey sky, big deal.  But I saw more than that, recognised I liked what I saw and thought about it for a while.  Look for the good, find the treasures - sometimes grey can turn into a rainbow.

These days are all we have.  We only live each day once.  Appreciate every day for what it is - your chance to live well.  Be mindful of your surroundings and the people you share your days with and you will, hopefully, find the sweetest kind of felicity.  Everyday happiness will be small and humble and you will need to notice it.  Taking pride in getting your work done - be that paid work or house work, knowing you did your best,  watching your children play, teaching what you know to someone who needs it, learning a new skill, baking your best  ever loaf of bread, hearing your family say: this is delicious Mum!, all these small things should be gathered up and thought about. These are not insignificant things, they are crucial. They will fill you up, they can fill your life up!  If you live mindfully, expecting to be happy, if you truly appreciate what each day holds - the good and the not so good, then you will get the full measure of every day.  And that, my friends, is quite an achievement.

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Simple Living Series - Working towards a better life

I was very busy day at work yesterday with meetings every hour and came home feeling I hadn't done much.  Yet when I came home and checked the comments on yesterday's post, I was so happy to read them I forgot about work and started thinking about compiling a list of resources that a few of you asked for.  It does my heart good to read so many of you are eager to learn, just as I am.

This daily work we do in our homes has the ability to make or break you.  I have no doubt that some people would wonder why I make soap when it's on every supermarket shelf, or why I'd spend time making bread when it's already sliced and wrapped waiting to be bought.  I also know there are some, and I believe it is a growing number, who not only understand me making those things, but do the same themselves or are on the road to learning the skills.  You understand the work and the urge and need to do it!

I have never been afraid of work.  I grew up in a working class family, slid into middle class when I worked for a living, and slide right back out again when I retired.  I happily think of myself as a worker,  Hanno is one too and we raised two boys to manhood with a strong work ethic and the knowledge that it is through work, both paid and unpaid, that we define ourselves and gain what is worthwhile in this life.  This work we do in our homes is, for the most part, gentle work, but it is relentless and it is there every day.  I have written before about housework never ending and you have to get your head around that, but when you do, when you realise that the work doesn't have to be perfect or even completed every day, you learn to relax and just do what  you planned to do each day and leave the rest for another time.  One of your jobs is to organise yourself so there is minimal work stress and you feel okay with saying: "I've done enough today, I'll spend time with the children/knitting/garden/relaxing/dogs now."  

Work is as much about how you think about it as it is about doing it.  A good attitude to it will help enormously.  It's also a great help to have a routine set up that will give a certain rhythm to your day.  Such a routine always starts with core tasks - those things we need to do every day - and is peppered with other things that are relaxing and enjoyable or harder jobs that are only done once in a while.  If you haven't set up a routine yet, now is a good time to do that. I have written about that here.

So here is the list of books and blogs that I have found helpful:

BOOKS

The Encyclopedia of Country Living.  When I first started to live more simply, this book inspired me like no other.  It would be most helpful to homesteaders and those who are using their backyards to produce food and keep chickens or goats, but overall I found her enthusiasm for living and her knowledge quite inspiring.

The Guide to Self Sufficiency.  I was lucky enough to win this book on Steelkittens blog giveaway and am now waiting patiently for it to arrive.  I have read this book before and know it well enough to recommend it - particularly for my UK and northern European readers.

Back to Basics.  I love this book.  I still enjoy reading through it whenever I see it at the library.

Easy organic gardening and moon planting is my favourite gardening book.  You'd be wise to find a book that is specifically for your climate. Lyn also has a very good blog here.

Nourishing Traditions - this book got me back to eating meat again after many years without it.  It's full of wise information about the way we eat and many recipes.

Artisan Bread in Five Minutes a Day.  I recently bought this book with the points I gain on my Amazon advertising.  I haven't read it through yet but the bits of it I have read convinced me of its worth.  I love good sourdough bread but I've never made a loaf that I thought would fit well into my bread recipes.  I'm hoping this book will help me find a good easy homemade sourdough that I like.

Your Money or Your Life.  A good book to get you on track with your money.

The Complete Tightwad Guide.  This is full of hints and tips about living frugally.

The Simple Living Guide.  The first book I ever read on Simple Living.

WEBSITES

http://www.baking911.com/ 

http://www.101cookbooks.com/

http://www.abc.net.au/tv/cookandchef/recipes/

http://www.aussiecooking.com.au/ 

http://www.nigella.com/recipe/nigella_recipes.aspx

https://www.ravelry.com/

http://www.sewmamasew.com/ 

BLOGS

http://www.soulemama.com/soulemama/ 

http://eyesofwonder.typepad.com/my_weblog/   Jewels doesn't blog much now but it's worth keeping her on your bloglist for when she does.  Hers is a generous and loving family, a fine example of what we are all striving for.

http://plainandjoyfulliving.blogspot.com/    I've only just started reading this blog but it's very charming.

http://matronofhusbandry.wordpress.com/

http://www.foodinjars.com/

http://myfrenchkitchen.wordpress.com/

http://blog.kingarthurflour.com/  

http://handembroiderynetwork.blogspot.com/

http://www.masondixonknitting.com/

http://grandmotherspatternbook.com/ 

http://www.purlbee.com/ 
http://notesfromthefrugaltrenches.com/

The Simple Living book photographed yesterday on my shelf is this one.

I would love to find more well written blogs like soulemama, eyes of wonder and throwback at trapper creek where the family is working on the kind of work I do here.  If you know of any that you think suit that criteria , please add the link to the comments and I'll check it out.

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Simple Living Series - Never stop learning

I grew up in a completely different time.  I was born into a time when even though we were fairly modern, we still did most things in a similar way to how they'd been done for hundreds of years.  We grew a few vegetables, we made most of what we ate, we made our own clothes and knitted warm woollies to keep us warm in Winter.  We soaked our grains before eating them, drank non-homogensied milk,  spread our bread with butter and ate what today is seen as an unhealthy diet.  We made a lot of what we used at home, we even cobbled our own shoes and I have memories of my father mending our shoes on a last.  Not only do you not see lasts in homes now, I guess most people don't know what one is.  See one here.

To answer the most asked question on my blog, the upturned pots are to stop us poking our eyes out on the stick - and I love the way they look.

In those days there was no such thing as "low fat" foods.  We all ate every part of the animal and it was common for women to make brawn/headcheese using up all those trotters and bits that could not be used in another way, but could definitely not be wasted either.

I don't want to go back to those days, I found the 1950s particularly repressive, and I think those women who romanticise the 50s housewife were probably not there to experience what it was like.  However, I do use many of the skills I grew up with and find they now come in handy when running my home in a simple way.  We live now in a way that shields us from a lot of the work we commonly did back then.  We have been deskilled and dumbed down because now we buy much of what was made at home; now we hope to save time by buying convenience rather than do it ourselves.  Modern living has made us dependent.

I have no doubt that there are many readers who cannot get by without convenience foods and though they'd love to eat good home made food they have to buy convenience because they have no time for anything else.  But I also know that many buy convenience foods because it's easier or because they don't know how to make what they would like to have.

One of the things that has been at the forefront of my life since I changed the way I live is to learn everything that would help me live more simply.  I had to reskill, remember, practise, read and learn what I needed to know.  It took time and effort but it has paid off in all sorts of splendid ways.  I have rediscovered the independence and self reliance I grew up with. I feel confident that I can look after myself and others and that I am caring for all of us in the best way possible. 

I doubt learning ever stops.  I hope  it doesn't because I find it very liberating and it has given me a kind of life that is uncommon these days.  If you're new to this way of living, if you're trying to simplify, I want to encourage you to learn all you can.  Identify what it is you need to know - if you're anything like me, the list will be long, and slowly embark of your journey of discovery.  Be careful where you get your information from, the internet is full of misinformation.  I have found a few blogs that I've been inspired by over the years, and many books, just make sure your information is from a creditable source.  Once you feel sure of your source, or sources, learn something new every day.

You can learn how to make pasta sauce instead of buying it by the jar, and you can make your own pasta - you don't need a pasta machine.  There are many delicious summer drinks to make instead of relying on soda and soft drink.  Homemade bread, cakes and biscuits/cookies are all better that their store bought cousins and if you can teach yourself how to make sauces, jams, relish, gravy and dressings, not only will you be better off financially, you'll be eating far fewer preservatives, flavour enhancers and colourings.  Soap and laundry powder made with your own hands is  better on your skin than anything you can buy.  You will be wearing unique clothing if you learn dressmaking, crocheting and knitting. Learning how to grow some of your own food, harvesting water and knowing how to preserve your harvests will give you a confidence unlike any other. There are so many more things to suggest but I'm sure you understand what I'm aiming at.

We all want to live a long life and feel healthy enough to enjoy every single day of it.  I think we short change ourselves by buying low fat foods, margarine, flavour enhanced food that can sit on a shelf for days, weeks, or sometimes months before you buy it.  I hope to encourage you towards the more traditional ways of cooking and homemaking where we were taught by our mothers and grandmothers and passed that knowledge on to our daughters and sons.  You may be too old now to learn at your mother's side but there are plenty of books and a few good blogs to guide you.  I think if you make that choice, not only will you be healthier, you'll also discover contentment through self reliance.  And there is a lot to be said for a contented life.

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