I'd like to clarify some things after reading a couple of yesterday's comments. I am sure my long term readers already know this and I feel it so deeply I don't spell it out in every post like this. I'm accepting of all types of relationships. In fact I wrote about this last week here. I don't expect to see only husbands and wives, or men working with women at home. I don't think every couple should have children. I think people should live to their own values (not mine) and do what makes them happy. I believe that is why I get so many emails about the stages of life - I don't judge and I don't expect anyone to live as I do. To me, a partnership is formed when two people commit to each other - those two people could be a man and a women, or the same sex, and they can be married or not. I have gay friends my age I have know most of my life, and they're all in relationships. I wrote yesterday's post directed at the woman who emailed me. It was her experience and mine I was referring to, it didn't reflect any specific view on what makes a family.
One of the reasons I write about homemakers so much - both men and women, is that many of them suffer because of the stereotypes applied to them, just as I suffer from the stereotypes applied to me - of what a women in her mid-60s believes. It is not acceptable to discriminate against others, but it seems to be still okay for many people to look down on homemakers, and for them to be very vocal about it. We need to change that.
There is a common understanding now that a couple should work to make the most of their earning capacity. It's fine if that is what your priority is, or if your circumstances compel both of you to focus on earning money to set yourself up and pay off debt. However, some people value staying at home, being a homemaker, raising children, looking after parents in their old age or volunteering, and for them, that is more important than earning as much money as possible. There are many who have disabilities and who can't work for a living but who save money at home and get by on a pension. It is possible to live well both ways - either by earning as much as you can, or by saving as much as you can. I gave up my career a few years ago, so you all know what camp I'm in. We know that if we cut back on our wants and buy only what we need, we don't need as much money as we used to earn. I spend my time now working from home as a writer, working in my community and working at home. I know many homemakers who have set up a small business that they run successfully from home.
Be warned, I will be writing about homemaking again next week. It will be a post about what we can all do to help change the outdated common view of homemaking.
One of the reasons I write about homemakers so much - both men and women, is that many of them suffer because of the stereotypes applied to them, just as I suffer from the stereotypes applied to me - of what a women in her mid-60s believes. It is not acceptable to discriminate against others, but it seems to be still okay for many people to look down on homemakers, and for them to be very vocal about it. We need to change that.
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One important part of being a homemaker is looking after the family finances. When there is someone out earning money, it is the person who stays at home who is responsible for stretching those dollars as much as possible. A saved dollar is more than an earned dollar - your saved dollar is tax-free. So one of the ways in which homemakers can feel very much a part of the financial viability of the family is to shop for grocery bargains, cook from scratch, and work on conserving electricity, gas, fuel and water. If you use all the ways in which you can save money by making what you need at home, you will cut your old supermarket bill to the bone and be on your way to "earning" money at home.
The stay at home person can draw up a budget and have a plan to pay off debt. Once a year they can go through all their regular bills to see if they can be lowered. We review out bills every year, ring up the opposition, ask what their deal is for the same thing we're paying their competitor for. If it's lower than we're paying, or if we would get more for our dollars, we ring our supplier and tell them and ask them to match it. Usually they do. We check statements when they come in, we've found mistakes in the past. We try not to withdraw money from ATMs, we get cash out at the supermarket instead. I have to confess, Hanno is much better than I am at that. He hasn't used an ATM for two years and, of course, we've saved paying bank fees because of that.
The homemaker is also responsible for looking after the family's assets - by carefully laundering and mending clothes and household linens, by keeping appliances clean and working according to their specifications. Everything that can be kept going - every towel and sheet you keep using before you turn it over to the rag bag, will save you money. Many of the things you do to save money in the home will be environmentally sound too.
There is a common understanding now that a couple should work to make the most of their earning capacity. It's fine if that is what your priority is, or if your circumstances compel both of you to focus on earning money to set yourself up and pay off debt. However, some people value staying at home, being a homemaker, raising children, looking after parents in their old age or volunteering, and for them, that is more important than earning as much money as possible. There are many who have disabilities and who can't work for a living but who save money at home and get by on a pension. It is possible to live well both ways - either by earning as much as you can, or by saving as much as you can. I gave up my career a few years ago, so you all know what camp I'm in. We know that if we cut back on our wants and buy only what we need, we don't need as much money as we used to earn. I spend my time now working from home as a writer, working in my community and working at home. I know many homemakers who have set up a small business that they run successfully from home.
So there you have it in a nutshell. Homemaking can be a dynamic career choice. Whether you use your time at home to learn as much as you can so you home produce and cook from scratch, or you're busy in the child raising years, or if you combine both, you can be rewarded for your efforts. There are many small ways to save money at home, they all take time and consistency but all those small ways add up. If you use the time you spend in your home not only for cooking, cleaning, raising children, mending, recycling etc., but also actively engaged in saving money, you will help provide for the family and pay off debt just as much as the partner who works outside the home.
Be warned, I will be writing about homemaking again next week. It will be a post about what we can all do to help change the outdated common view of homemaking.
