10 October 2022

An ordinary day, step-by-step

It was a dark day yesterday. It had rained overnight and there were showers all morning. As I passed through the kitchen, it was too dark so I lit candles and brought some gentle light in. Breakfast was grilled cheese on toast with black tea which I enjoyed on the verandah while Gracie explored the yard. It was a good start to the day.



Then the dishwasher was emptied, sink scrubbed, the stove was wiped over and benches cleaned and dried. I had the radio on, listening to Australia All Over, and I was quite happy to discover the microwave needed cleaning - more time to be spent in the kitchen. I set a bowl of water and vinegar in there (I often use half a lemon instead of vinegar), turned it on for 10 minutes and wiped it clean again.  Ready for another week of defrosting and reheating.

With the kitchen finished I made my bed, wiped the bathroom over, opened up all the windows at that end of the house, folded up a couple of quilts and put them back in their original plastic covers and stored them in the wardrobe for next winter.



Two photos above: the back garden at this time last year. Just before Hanno got sick. 

All work stopped then for morning tea.  I got a drink and a biscuit and went back to the front verandah. Grace and I shared a stem ginger biscuit, I turned off the radio and listened to my Sunday morning neighbourhood. I looked around the plants accumulating on the verandah and made some plans in my head for cuttings and seeds, and then had to edit my over-enthusiasm. I identified the plants that would guarantee my mental health as well as the ones that would help add beauty to this odd side-verandah garden and ditched the rest. After watering all the plants. We went inside.  I'll have a post about the new garden soon.



We've been growing food here for 25 years. I think that's why I find it so difficult to give it up completely. On the verandah garden I now have roses, salvias, foxgloves, yarrow, lavender, gaura and have added more flowers and some herbs and vegetables - capsicum, tomato, chives and parsley. I have cleome and nasturtium seeds too and I doubt I'll resist the urge to plant them. 🤫





The photos above, up to the chard, are all photos of gardens in our past. We grew almost all the vegetables we ate which saved us a lot of money and gave us both wonderful hours spent in the gardens over the years.



We also kept heirloom chickens, which, like heirloom seeds need backyard gardeners to keep them alive and thriving. If you are thinking of buying chickens, check out the heirloom varieties and not just the old red hens which are bred for the caged eggs industry.


So, back to yesterday's step-by-step ... phone calls from Tricia and Kerry.

Sunday lunch was a mushroom omelette with salad. After lunch I watched an episode of Vera.  I love that show. We have an older woman in her green cloth hat and overcoat overseeing a team of detectives and giving them a bit of a hurry up when they don't work as fast as she does. It's a breath of fresh air because we don't often have such a scenario. If we went on the usual TV formula, you'd be forgiven if you thought older people, men and women, were only capable of portraying victims or pensioners doing their shopping.  🙄


This is the developing garden on the front verandah. 

After Vera, I picked some lemons and rearranged the outdoor furniture on the back verandah. I pulled the table and chairs back towards the house because if the weather reports are true, it will be another wet summer, with the possibility of floods ... again. While this was happening, Gracie discovered a cane toad under a sheet of metal in the old vegetable garden.  She tried to get it out but luckily it was too far in. Cane toads are dangerous animals. They secrete poison on the top of their necks and if they get caught by another animal, which is usually by the neck, the dog or cat is poisoned. We had a cat in that situation years ago. She foamed at the mouth, got very ill and ended up at the vet's.  I threw a ball around the backyard for Gracie to chase to get her away from the toad and when she went inside, I removed the metal, exposed the toad and saw it hop down to the creek.

Not every task I do here is rewarding or fulfilling but doing the unrewarding things gives me a feeling of achievement as well as the knowledge that I'm doing what I need to do to look after me and Gracie. I realise now that Hanno did a lot of those unpleasant tasks and I probably didn't thank him enough for what he did.  I did bake a lot of his favourite cakes though and maybe that was enough.  Now, each time I do something difficult or something I don't want to do, it makes it easier the next time because I know I'm stronger than I think I am.

I went inside at fiveish drank some water and thought about making toast. Instead I saw the one blood orange I bought last week and had that. I LOVE blood oranges and this one was dark red and absolutely delicious. If I see any next week I'll buy them to make blood orange marmalade. 

As it was getting dark, I went around the house closing all the windows and blinds. I put some stained tea towels and dishcloths in to soak, cleaned the laundry sink and folded what was in the dryer. I watched ten minutes of news and some YouTube before having a shower and then read till I fell asleep.

Another day full of all the ordinary things that make up my life now.  It's not exciting, I think those days are behind me, but it is fulfilling and meaningful. Today I've been sewing, reading and drawing and the only housework was cooking. I think that's the key really. When there is no one else to mix things up a bit, you have to make sure you don't get in a rut and just keep repeating the same thing most days. Satisfaction comes from living a life that is slow and has depth and I think I have that. The depth is provided by my ever-loving family and maintaining a level of productivity that keeps me engaged and interested. I think I'm pretty luckily actually.

Hello to all the newcomers, there are quite a few of you. Welcome. Thanks to all my readers who take the time to comment. It lets me know who is out there and while I don't answer every comment, I do read and appreciate each one.  I hope you're doing well and the troubles of the world haven't caused too many problems where you live.  xx


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80 comments

  1. An ordinary but lovely day, you always sound so peaceful with your life and I do think that is a wonderful thing to have achieved. I know you have had so much sadness this last 12 months., but your appreciation of the little things in your life is always a great read. All the very best.,

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  2. I never think to light a candle when I'm up early in the morning, but I should. The light is nice and gentle and exactly right for that time of day isn't it.

    Oh, I'm sure Hanno knew that you silently thanked him for all those little jobs that he probably did almost without thinking sometimes. We each have our areas in the house and garden, and the things we do for each other are often thanks enough.

    It sounds like a simply perfect home-y style day to me.

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    1. I agree, Sue. The things we do for each other is ongoing appreciation.

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  3. Thank you for another post Rhonda. We haven't met in person, but your posts are so personal and descriptive that I feel like I know you and enjoy catching up with your daily life. I appreciate that you take the time to write your blog. I have both your books and have you to thank for my simple and fulfilling life, enjoying my home and garden. I no longer feel the need for a holiday and when I am away from home, I can't wait to return! Thanks again, Tracy

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    1. Thanks Tracy. I'm glad you're living a fulfilling life. xx

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  4. Hi Rhonda, I find it so inspiring to read about how you adjust to a new phase in life. My life has changed quite a bit due to a divorce, and in a few years my children will move. Then I will be on my own; I look forward to it in a way but it will also bring many changes that I have started to prepare for mentally. Happy to see you keep on writing your posts :-) Have a nice week! Hanne.

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    1. It's always good to be prepared for life's changes, Hanne. Take care. xx

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  5. Hello, Rhonda -- I've been reading your posts for a long time though I don't think I've ever commented, but I wanted you to know that I'm sure you have many more readers than you realize.🙂 Here in North America we are heading into fall and winter, and we will soon be switching back to standard time, with darker evenings; I forget about candlelight and how calming it is and I thank you for the reminder.☺️ Your account of an ordinary day is beautiful, and the adjustments you're making to your routine are very well-thought-out and tailored to your needs. I know there must be times of sadness, but you are showing that it's possible to make changes in order to keep living a productive and satisfying life, even if it's very different from the one you were used to. Thank you for your writing and for the glimpses into your home and your thoughts. Your photos are lovely and I always look forward to them. Take care of yourself, and have a nice (flood-free🤞) summer. ~ A faithful reader, Louise 🙂

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    1. Thanks for your comment, Louise. Get those candles ready and enjoy the winter ahead. xx

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  6. It sounds like you are finding a lovely ebb and flow to your days. It's fun to hear about others' day-to-day lives. Your gardens are so inviting. I do hope that you can allow yourself to continue growing what you can. It's self-nurturing.

    Be well sweet Rhonda.

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  7. Always enjoy reading your posts. So glad you are doing well.

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  8. Hi there Rhonda, I’ve been reading your blog for years, this is my first comment.
    I agree that a day full of steady satisfying work around your home gives one a
    Feeling of achievement and satisfaction, also the garden to me is a daily joy.Juanita

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  9. I’ll take fulfilling and rewarding over exciting any day.

    I’m glad to hear you days are filled with tasks that keep you going. Mostly I’m glad you are healthy and that you and Gracie are together.

    Lovely photos as always.

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  10. Thank you for continuing to share your life!! Right now, I am helping my husband, in a lot of ways, caretaking...and one never knows when life will drastically change, but your sharing is a comfort in thinking ahead to the future.

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    1. Hello Elizabeth. Caretaking is such a difficult phase of life. I hope you have support and take time for yourself when you can. It's important. xx

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  11. love your blog, Rhonda and have followed it for many years. Sometimes i go back through the old posts and re-read the ones which were my favourites. It was, and still is, very inspirational when sometimes the grind of being a stay at home mum to three gets a bit too much. Your posts give me the energy to appreciate what i have and the inspiration to make the most of the opportunity.

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    1. Hi Sally. I look back on my time with my young children, it felt like it would never end, and now I realise it passed in a heartbeat. I'm so pleased you're getting something from my writing. Thanks for your comment. xx

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  12. This was a wonderful read, Rhonda. You do indeed have some lovely memories to cherish, and it feels like you are doing very well with everything. If you don't mind though, I am a bit concerned that it appears that you had no protein yesterday, except for the eggs whites in the omelet. Please make sure you have a balanced diet even though you live alone now. It is important to get proper nourishment as I know you know. But we get into easier routines now and again. I bet your garden is wonderful!

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    1. Thanks Hopflower. I make sure I have enough protein every day. I had two full eggs in the omelette and with the mushrooms, even more. I drank milk during the day, had grilled cheese on ancient grains toast for breakfast. Protein is essential for everyone, more so for seniors. I always remember that.

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  13. I've just opened your blog and smiled delightedly when I saw a new entry.
    Thank you so much.
    I always have plenty to mull over after reading your posts.
    Today it's trying vinegar and water in the microwave.
    Here on the Isle of Man we are getting ready for winter as you prepare for summer.
    Yesterday our visitors were unable to travel home because the sea was too rough.
    A bonus for us but I was glad that i could rustle up a couple of extra meals without much bother.
    I'm a similar age to you and I appreciate your sharing the early months of learning to live without a partner after any years of marriage.
    It's not something that I've needed to face yet you are helping me to ask questions that need to be faced.
    Sue

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    1. Hi Sue. Being prepared and asking those questions will help you when the time comes. I hope your winter isn't too severe. xx

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  14. I thought of you yesterday, as I was canning tomatoes. It is so satisfying to know we’ll have our own canned tomatoes from the garden, ready to eat, until this time next year. Like you, I’m slowing down and trying to prioritize what is important. Our own home grown, stewed tomatoes still make the cut! Like you, though, I’m realizing we won’t be able to keep the garden size we have now. We’ll continue to do what we are able to do. The key is knowing that’s enough.

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    1. Knowing what's enough IS the key. It sounds like you're working towards your future with the knowledge to make it work well. xx

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  15. Thank you, Rhonda, for sharing your daily life. It's particularly comforting to me as a new widow. (I lost my husband of 43 years suddenly in May.) I live with my adult son with dev. disabilities, who thrives on routine. So it's hard to make new paths but I'm trying.

    If you like stories with older characters, you might enjoy the three books Richard Osman has written, starting with The Thursday Murder Club. All of the main characters are seniors. The books are entertaining mysteries.

    Thanks again,
    Daisy

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    1. I'm so sorry for your loss, Daisy. Just do what you can and keep thinking about improvements you can make that don't disturb your son's routines. Everyone's path will be different - you just have to work for the one that's right for your situation. xx

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  16. Hi Rhonda. I’m reading this at silly o’clock as I’ve woken up and can’t go back to sleep. I love the idea of lighting candles on a dark rainy day. I worked Monday and will again today but I did manage to duck out to the garden between showers and pick zucchini and cucumbers. We are going away for a couple of weeks next month but after that I’d like to get another dog after losing our beloved pooch in 2020. Gracie has the best life with you there in the garden. Hope your drawing is going well. Katie

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    1. A new dog sounds like a good idea to me. It will enjoy your garden with you and give you many happy hours. xx

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  17. I enjoyed your post today. I have been puttering this morning trying catch up on things undone for a while because of a surgery I had. When you mentioned all the things that Hanno did for you that were the thing you didn’t like to do it made me think of my long suffering husband. He has done so much of the stuff around the house that he doesn’t enjoy doing because I couldn’t. I need to make sure and thank him for all he does. Now that I am no longer the invalid I was for a while he is moving back to those things he has always done and I am trying to get back into my old routines.
    The browser didn’t support my login so I will sign off as Nancy in Vancouver WA.

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  18. Hi! Thank you for continuing to write! And I appreciate your days, similar to mine except your gardens and yard are exceptionally beautiful. I am not a gardener and also live in the desert, so those are my excuses ;). Thanks again for the time you spend, I have learned so much from your books and blog! Hilogene in Arizona.

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  19. Catherine PritchardOctober 11, 2022 3:12 am

    I love how much you manage to fit in each day without hurrying or stress. Gardening (lovely veg), cooking and even making cleaning interesting

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  20. Sounds like a fulfilling day indeed. I do have a partner that mixes things up for me (a bit too much sometimes ;-) ), but I have noticed I feel the most satisfied after a day's work when I don't stick too much to rigid schedules. Instead of of crossing off repeating tasks and rushing through the list, I just do the things I need or want to do that day. Taking care of my home and my family that way feels so much more meaningful.

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  21. ❤️ I so very much admire you. Always have.

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  22. Hello Rhonda,

    Don't you just love "ordinary" days? As I have gotten older, I can now treasure those ordinary days. I do not like the hectic, busy days. When I was younger and raising our family, I could handle those days and not think twice about it. Now, I simply love the ordinary days I can putter around the house and do as I will.

    Thanks for the glimpse into yours. I'm going to change the bed sheets and then have a cup of tea outside and watch the leaves flutter for a bit before cleaning out a clothes cupboard.

    Take care,
    Darlene

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    1. Hello Darlene. Enjoy your day. xx

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  23. Thank you for sharing your day Rhonda. It is my aim to find peace & joy in the simple things in life. I’m only just beginning - one step at a time. Thanks for your inspiration. Jx

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  24. I loved reading this description of your day, so restful and with a unique rhythm that's timeless and comforting.
    Alison in Wales x

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  25. What a lovely description of a meaningful and satisfying day. I really enjoy the intentionality with each task. It’s not just about checking things off a to-do list. I look forward to every one of your posts. Thank you.

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  26. I enjoyed reading about your day in between taking laundry off the line and cleaning my kitchen before cooking supper. Tonight we are having beef in cream sauce over pasta with roasted carrots. Our fridge has been out for a week so our fresh produce is down to onions, potatoes, carrots, apples, and pears. Maybe an apple salad would be good too. I’m always inspired by you to adjust my habits and routines to my life as it is today and I appreciate that so much! Thanks for sharing! ❤️ Love from Arkansas!

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  27. A gloomy day really does affect how you feel in the house, doesn't it? I guess we can't have bright sun all the time, but I feel so much better when we do. :)

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  28. About twenty-five years ago I was on holiday in Great Britain and I bought a paperweight with a portrait of Rudyard Kipling and the words "Teach us delight in simple things". I think this is a good way to live a content life. Yesterday I took out my winter clothes, especially the warm sweaters I have knitted over the years and only rarely worn. I am now very happy about them, because with the gas prices rising and possible blackouts they will be put ot good use. We also have a lot of refugees here, first women and children from Ukraine, now young men from Russia. I hope I will be able to help a little bit, with donations of useful things, money or my time.

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  29. Thank you so much for another post Rhonda. I love reading about your days which personify simplicity in its truest form. It encourages and reminds me that a life of meaning, purpose and fulfilment doesn’t have to be packed and busy. Wanting a simple life is so often viewed negatively in society which is why your blog is validation to others who have chosen a different path. Thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤️

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  30. Ah dear Rhonda, when I lack a bit of energy, I just have to come to your blog, and I'm feeling better now! It's funny ,here in France too we have two episodes of Véra on TV on sunday evenings . But often I only see one because I fall asleep in front of it ;-)
    Do you know the series "Barnaby"? I like it very much, especially the beautiful landscapes of the english countryside.
    I like how you describe your slow days : they look like mine...
    Take care

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  31. I'm gla

    I think there is beauty in the ordinary. It's a beautiful simplicity that I believe is completely underrated.

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  32. Dear Rhonda, so lovely to continue to share your life's journey. I and many other longtime readers, who care and worry are relieved to hear your updates. Your lovely writing is so familiar, your recent headline about 'it doesn't have to be perfect ' is becoming a sort of mantra as I have recently suffered with some anxiety and have a tendency to 'over do' everything. Thankyou and best wishes for a lovely week.

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    1. Thank you, Jenny. I'll continue to give occasional updates but you shouldn't worry about me, I'm doing well. Sending love to you. xx

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  33. I love hearing about your ordinary days. I find myself wondering what I will do if my husband of 36 years goes first. I cannot imagine. But I know I will go on with God's help. Thank you for being brave and sharing this.
    Laura
    Missouri USA

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  34. Barbara from WY USA
    I so look forward to reading your blog. Yes peace can be found in a simple life style. I hope that my children can see this by watching me. To have peace is to have joy and even though times can be hard you are drawn back to the simple things of life. Your wisdom, desire and ability to share your life is a gift you give to so many. Thank you so very much. We may be so many miles apart but share a kindred spirit. Take care and continue on this journey of life as the rest of us also do.

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  35. I'm just commenting to let you know Im here Rhonda. Im always sending love your way. You give me so much. ❤

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    1. Thanks Mandi. I appreciate that. xx

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  36. Thankyou for sharing about your everyday life. I know I must be hard adapting. My dad felt completely lost without my mum but his garden became his sanctuary after her passing. He maintained what he could esp her roses and kept fewer veggies but he learnt to make apricot jam and some new meals which was a thrill to watch when he was 85 and more. He surprised himself and learnt new skills, limits and priorities. His garden was his lifeline as well as his wonderful neighbour and his family! One is never too old to learn new tricks or time saving ways ! Lynette SA

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  37. All the soothing details - thanks Rhonda. Except for Gracie's cane toad encounter, that was a bit of a jolt : ) Glad it had a happy ending! Beth in MN

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  38. Hello Rhonda, This is also my first ever comment even though I have been reading your blog for a very long time. I have enjoyed your books and indeed bought copies for my three daughters. I want to thank you for your wisdom over the years, teaching and encouraging us to live slower and fulfilling lives that are centred around our homes. Very best wishes.

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    1. Thanks for your comments, Linda, and for buying my books.

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  39. "Now, each time I do something difficult or something I don't want to do, it makes it easier the next time because I know I'm stronger than I think I am."
    Oh, yes, this rings so true. I have been a single mum for eight years now, and I have had to do so much that I never dreamed I could, all the way from selling and buying a house to climbing on the roof yesterday to clean out the gutters before the rain came pouring down here in northern Tasmania. Like you with the toad and your precious pup, I have found that I can be strong for those I love, and while I sometimes regret having to be strong, I love the feeling of strength and fulfilment of being able to do what I need to to take care of myself and my family.
    I am one of your new readers, Rhonda, and so much appreciate your gentle, honest posts. Travel well through your days, and thank you for your thoughts and for sharing your life experience.

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  40. It is always such a treat to come to your blog and find a new post. You and your home are a calm place in a troubled world. I find myself looking for more places like yours; excitement is not something I seek now.

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  41. I'm still here, Rhonda, reading and learning from afar, minding your message of living life gently. Much love to you, xxxx

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    1. It's so good to see you here again, Sue. xx

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  42. Why is it so interesting to so many of us to read of others’ ordinary days? I guess we like to know we are not alone in some of the things we do, and that there are quite a lot of us who appreciate family, home and the simple life. Not to mention we get to learn from each other, things of importance. Thanks for writing and sharing.

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  43. I LOVE Vera tooo!!! Recovering from Covid and catching up on Vera from first season. Also continuuing reading your blog entries after stopping midway a few years back. Thank you for your wisdom and kindness, Rhonda😘 Also am reading your book properly now as I am not in a hurry any more…sending love and hugs from Malaysia

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    1. Hello Su'ad. I hope you recover fully from Covid. Thanks for your comment. xx

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  44. Always inspirational Rhonda - thanks for your blog post! Now off to clean the microwave...

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  45. I love reading about your 'ordinary days' as I know your other followers do. I feel motivated and almost validated when I read about your tasks. It's interesting you're talking about how it's warming up where you live, while here in Texas we're just starting to cool off for the season. Where you're worried about repeated flooding rains, we're still worried about prolonged and severe drought. I suppose no matter where you live there will be things to work around. But, like you, we're finding ways around the troubling weather. Thank you for sharing your days with us Rhonda! ~TxH~

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  46. Rhonda querida ,espero que estes bien y que tu casa no se haya inundado.Bendiciones

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    1. There's no flooding here where I live but we have big rains coming. We had floods in February so I hope that whatever comes, it's not as bad as it was then.

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  47. Hi Rhonda, Wow! Look at all these comments you have. It's so nice to see you blogging again. Your day sounds peaceful and productive. It is getting colder here now. I love sitting by the fire with the dogs, and quietly knitting. I've got a cheap cut of steak simmering on the stove, with lot of herbs and spices from the garden. Red potatoes are baking in the even. I love seeing photos of your vegetable garden. What an accomplishment. Your soil must be so rich...

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    1. Hello Stephenie. You paint a beautiful picture of life in your cabin. We are on 95% clay here so it's been a process of composting and building the soil over the years. It's really rich good soil now in the vegetable garden.

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  48. Your post was lovely to read Rhonda. As I was reading, I was picturing you and Gracie moving through your day. I love to read your thoughts on everyday life and admire how you are navigating these new times ❤️

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  49. Lovely reading your post Rhonda, and some of my days are just like yours. It's so nice though that you have Gracie and your family around. It's lovely to have flowering plants isn't it, so good for our mental health, and we don't grow many vegetables in Summer now as we have excellent markets to shop at when necessary. Our Summers are too hot for much vegetable gardening. Take good care. Pauline x

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  50. I have thoroughly enjoyed this post about your day. I still have an extremely busy life with grown kids, new grandkids, a working husband and so many people and to-do's that call for my attention. I often wonder if I'll ever get to the season of life where I can have simple days of just caring for my home and feeding my soul with creative endeavors. But, I realize I shouldn't rush that season into existence, because I will probably then complain over not having enough noise. Isn't that the way it works? :) Each season brings it's own blessings. I can't wait to read more of your blog and look into your books.

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    1. All the seasons are there to prepare us for what will come next. Don't rush any of them, you'll be short-changing yourself. xx

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  51. Hello from Key West! I love this post, reminding me that the simple life is pleasant, serene, and meaningful. Thank you!

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  52. Hallo from The Netherlands. It was nice to read because you write it so visually. Every day is worth living, although we sometimes have to cry for what once was. I love ordinary days!

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  53. Hi Rhonda, thank goodness for "ordinary days"; I love them because I always feel calm when I drift off to sleep.
    I've only recently read your blog from last month about reducing living costs and I wanted to contribute if I may. We found that ensuring our Home Building and Home Contents under separate policies was cheaper with our insurance company (I rang for quotes). Our insurer also gives a discount for each policy held, and having the two ho.e insurance policies rather than a combined "Building and Contents" has increased the discount we receive on all policies. This may not apply in every situation, and I have to be honest and say that I didn't shop around when renewing.

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  54. Hi Rhonda thank you for taking us trough your day! It is very inspiring but also calming to read about your every day life!! Lots of ❤️ Angela

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  55. I’ve just discovered you through your boom and so glad I have. I’ve just resigned from being a college teacher in the UK.I’ve had this job for over 20 years but it’s become stressful to the point where I don’t feel able to do my job to the standard I want in the hours I’m given and so I’m retiring early. It’s been difficult and I know I’ve lost part of my identity and I will miss my students and colleagues. BUT I’m lucky to be able to give it up and know I can adjust albeit slowly. I’m looking forward to living a simple life now. Your blog and books have helped me to be positive and excited. I’m going to clean out my desk today. Thank you . X

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  56. I'm sure Hanno knew you appreciated the things he did, as I'm sure he appreciated the things you did, like baking his favourite cakes & meals.

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  57. I absolutely love Vera too, but I think I have seen all of them, some a couple of times!

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  58. Reading your posts brings my blood pressure right down. Thank you for sharing your life with us.

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  59. Hello Rhonda! I've been reading you for years. It started from a soap making recipe. Greetings from Poland : ) Magdalena

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