As you all realise, what I write about each day here on my blog is just a small fraction of what actually happens here. I know this post is not going to be optimistic, instructive or supportive but I want to write about real life and this is as real as it gets.
One of my best friends has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She was told about a week ago but yesterday, she had a consultation with the surgeon who will operate on her; yesterday made it painfully "real" to me. I can't stop thinking about it now. When her children were told they rushed up here to be with her. Both her son and daughter went with her to the consultation yesterday. She is surrounded by people who love her, she is optimistic that the treatment will work and she will go into the surgery hopeful of a bright future. I just wish I could see her. She lives only a short distance from us but I've still got the flu, I haven't been able to talk for two days now, and I can't go near her until I'm fully recovered.
Significant and life changing moments like these always make me stop in my tracks and think about my own life. Am I being the best I can be? Am I doing what I should be doing? How can I change to make my life more meaningful? What am I not doing that I should be doing? I think I fall short when I answer those questions truthfully. I know I could be doing a lot more than I do. While I don't intend to change how I live, I do intend to make some personal changes and I intend to say yes to more of the many opportunities that come my way instead of saying no all the time.
Time is all we are given. How we use that time is our choice but maybe it is also a test of the kind of person we are. I hope to use my time more efficiently in the future. I don't want to waste time - that is unforgivable. I want to be the best version of Rhonda that I can be, I want to continue on my quest for a simple life and I am determined to be more organised than I have been in the past. Oh, I will still luxuriate on the front veranda with cups of tea, that is not a waste of time, it's an investment, and I will continue to take things slowly but I'm going to have a list each day and I'm going to follow it. No doubt there there will be a few other changes in the wind as I move through the coming months with my friend.
Life has a way of shaking us up and making us focus on the important things. This will, no doubt, be much tougher on my friend than it is on us, but we intend to be there to help her though it in any way we can. She has been a fine friend to Hanno and I so now we can return some of the goodness she sent our way. Send your prayers and best wishes out to her please, she is a good woman.