Connecting the dots in your simple life

My neighbour gave me these beautiful lilies yesterday. She is a florist and they were left over from a wedding.

How are you going with your move towards a greener and simpler life? It's difficult sometimes, isn't it? I would imagine that almost all the people who read this blog are here to read about ways to live more simply in one way or another. I have been doing many of the things we do now for many years, but the entire package didn't come together for me until a few years ago. It was when I really focused on how I would change that it all fell into place.

For example, we've kept chooks in the backyard for over 20 years, I've baked bread on and off for that time too. When we lived in the bush, we stockpiled. We've eaten organic food for many years, we've grown vegetables when we had the time. But all these things seemed to be disjointed and random. They were never part of a formula that made up a philosophy of life. Now they are. Now all these parts are connected, they flow into each other and they're in our lives everyday, not haphazardly like they were before.

What changed to make that happen was the way I looked at what I was doing. It helped to have a name to hang on it, so I could focus on"simple living" and not chooks, stockpiling, organic vegetables, slowing down, and all the rest of the elements of this lifestyle. When I had the name for it, I knew I wasn't alone in my thinking and when I found others who lived how I wanted to live, that motivated me like nothing else. I knew I didn't have to move to the country to live the way I wanted, I knew I would have to learn how to do a lot of the things I wanted to do and I knew that if I was not going to earn a living as before, I would have to budget and save as much as I could. I'd already realised that shopping was an insatiable fire that would continue to feed me all I ever wanted, and all I didn't want as well. It had to stop and when it did, I suppose that was the first conscious step I took on the road to my simple life.

My plan was to stop shopping for crap, to change the way I shopped for groceries and to make as much as I could myself. In my home my aim was to rethink how I viewed housework and to make what I did in my home meaningful and rewarding. I did that by realising every single thing I did at home, I did for my family or myself. Knowing that, and really understanding it, made that change possible. It was like a light turned on inside my head; one of those cartoon moments when the light globe comes on and you can almost see new ideas forming and old ways melting away. If what I was doing at home was for us - for Hanno, Shane, Kerry and I, then what greater incentive could I have. The better I did my house work, the more comfortable we'd all be, and I would be caring for our greatest financial investment - our family home. Mind you, I do not agree that a mother and wife should do all the housework. When our sons were young they were given chores to do and they had to keep their rooms clean and tidy. When they were older, they were expected to mow the lawn, help with the tidying up and take out the rubbish. Hanno always did most of the outdoor work and all the repair work. So although my focus had changed and I know saw value in what I did in the home, I was not the sole worker there. I think housework should be shared. Now there are just the two of us I usually work in the house and Hanno works outside, but there are many times we cross over when I do one of "his" jobs and he does one of "mine". I see my work here as challenging, honourable and rewarding. I now see that it contributes significantly towards how we feel and that if everything has been done well here, that flows on to other things in our lives.

Sometimes when you're on the road to somewhere, like a simpler life, you wonder if you'll ever get there. I am proof that change is possible. If you were to ask my advice, I'd tell you to focus on yourself first and to understand that you may already be doing a lot of the things that make up this lifestyle. If it still feels disjointed to you, try to connect the dots. Work out for yourself how you saving on your grocery bills and cutting back on your use of water and electricity helps to pay off your debt. Work it out on paper if you have to. Convince yourself. Develop a plan and develop new values that will facilitate and support your simple life. When you focus on a simpler life, really understand it in your own head and start the first small steps on your plan, it will come together. And when it does that, you can help it slowly trickle down to the other members of your family.