Today we're travelling to South Africa to visit Wendy who is living simply on her urban homestead, homeschooling her four children.

We are a South Africa homeschooling family of 6 (mom, dad, 2 girls, 2 boys, 3 dogs, 5 chickens, 1 goldfish - oops that's more than 6!) living in Cape Town, South Africa. Nestled between the Two Oceans (Indian and Atlantic) and beautiful Table Mountain where we work from home, homeschool, home church and enjoy a simple life in this urban centre. I have sent this photo with my front door open as "Where I Work" encompasses our whole home and garden.

In 2008 we started on our urban homestead journey by exchanging rose bushes and lawn for growing vegetables. This second photo is of our first veggie garden. Two other sections were soon converted to grow more vegetable which means in summer and autumn we only eat vegetables from our garden. This simple step in growing our own food has spawned new interest in a simple lifestyle and other homesteading skills, like canning and preserving, cooking from scratch, sewing and knitting, keeping urban chickens and a move to a more organic lifestyle.

Wendy's blog is here.

Please note: I'm not taking any more submissions for this where I work series.

Most of you know that we live in the sub tropics and one of the reasons we chose this area to live in was the annual rainfall. It wasn't the only factor in our choice of property when we bought our home, but it was one of the important ones. We knew when we came here that we'd grow vegetables and keep chickens, so we knew we'd need plenty of water. Our average rainfall here is 1800mm/70inches and that gives us good rain throughout the year, although most of it is in the summer storms we have. We have several dams near us and south of us that supply our state capital with drinking water. Happily, our dams have been almost full since be moved here 13 years ago, a product, no doubt, of our good rainfall. But now our State government has seen fit to build a pipeline that will take much of the water that falls here to supplement the rain that falls in the capital's catchment area. We are paying for that pipeline with our taxes, we are also now paying increased water and sewage charges.

Last week we received the first of these new water bills. Get this. Even though we consume less that half the average amount of household water (545 litres/143 gallons), our bill is still $388.80 for six months. An average water bill for this area mustbe about $600! According to our bill, we use 240 litres a day here, we're under the average because there are usually only two of us here and we are very frugal with our water consumption. One of the first things we installed when we moved in here was a 5000 litre water tank. We used that tank to establish our vegetable garden and to keep the vegetables growing during times of drought. When we could afford it, and with the help of a State government grant, we installed an additional, bigger tank which now gives us a 15,000 litre water holding capacity. That water is collected from the roof on the house and shed. We have pumps on both tanks so we can use hoses on them. The water in both tanks is used for everything that needs water outside. It waters the animals and chickens, the gardens, cleans the car and house and washes some of our clothes - Hanno hooked up our old front loader washing machine to one of the tanks and that does some of our washing out on the back verandah.

So why am I telling you all this? I think it's vitally important that we all have a water management plan for our homes. Even though you may think you've got the rainfall you need to manage your property, your government, like ours, may have other plans for it. Never believe that what you have now you will have next year - even something as vital or as seemingly predictable as water.

Hanno installed a rain gauge on the weekend. We use to have one but it died of old age and when it did, we didn't replace it. Getting this water bill has galvanised me into action again. We have to be even more cautious with our water now, not only because every drop of it costs us money but because, environmentally, it's a wise strategy. Our ecosystems need water to function properly so taking as little as we can for our own use helps provide a sustainable future for our wildlife and flora and our wider community.

Having a rain gauge helps me stay in touch with our rainfall. It makes me conscious of what we have falling as rain and how much we have stored. I used to keep a daily spreadsheet when we had our old rain gauge, but this new one has a nifty daily meter on the top and you take your monthly record from that. Most homes have their own water meter and it's sound environmental practice to measure your water usage and try to reduce it. You can do that by collecting rainfall and using that on your garden or to clean outside.

There are many other strategies to help you reduce the water you're using. Here is a chart showing average water consumption in Australia. Simple things like turning off the tap while you clean you teeth, not pre-rinsing your plates when you use a dishwasher, and for those, like me, who wash up by hand, don't use running water. Don't fill the kettle for just one cup of tea, have shorter showers and use a front loader for your clothes. All these actions save small amounts, but that's the key to this - it's small amounts that add up over the course of your six month water bill.

Water conservation is something we should all be focusing on. It's not just for countries like Australia. I'm sure many of you are already wisely using the water that falls or is piped to your homes. Please tell me how you manage your water. I am hoping to drop our consumption to 200 litres per day by Christmas.

I woke, as usual, just before 4, showered, dressed and crept out to the kitchen. There is baking to be done - some cakes for a fundraiser this morning. I'm making the whole orange cake as little bundt cakes and muffins. Alice is sleeping, nothing else is happening. I am alone in the world. I get the cakes in the oven and turn on the computer. Outside, rain is falling. It's the beginning of another day, different to all the yesterdays, yet similar.

I like to get a lot of my tasks finished by 9am. I never hurry what I'm doing; I'm not in a hurry. If I'm not finished by 9, it will be soon after; I rarely know what the time is anyway. I write my blog before anything else - except today when I baked first. If I write first, it helps me think about what I'll do during the day, it focuses me on my simple life and it connects me with you. Although I work alone, I prefer the Amish ideal of collective work - that many hands make it light, and although I don't have your hands to help with my work, nor do mine help with yours, the mere idea of you being there draws me into my tasks and reassures me that we are part of something bigger. Once the blog is done, my apron is on and work begins.

Pre-9am work is feeding the animals, letting the chooks out, checking the garden, breakfast, deciding on what we'll eat for dinner and defrosting, if necessary. After breakfast I make bread and get it on to rise, wash up by hand, clean down the benchtops and sweep the floors. I make the bed, if the bed linen needs changing, it's washed and hung outside to dry. Luckily I can do that if it's dry or raining because Hanno made me a very nifty sheltered clothes line last year. Sometimes the bathroom needs cleaning, or soap or cleansers need to be made, or the verandahs need sweeping, sometimes I dust, vacuum or wash the floors. I have no strict routine to work to. I do things when the need arises and when I feel like doing it. It all gets done eventually with no stress, and no guilt if I leave it for another day. I am my own boss here and I'm very good to the staff.

When you bring a celery head in from the garden, or buy one, wash it, take of the top (to use in soups and stews) and wrap it in aluminium foil. If you wrap it when it's moist, with no holes in the foil, you will have crisp celery for at least 6-8 weeks.

After 9ish, I write, breaking for lunch around noon and sometimes a nap in my big soft chair. What a luxury that is, to sit and relax enough to feel sleepy, then to drift off to sleep. I had never liked sleeping during the day but but now it's deliciously self indulgent and although I don't nap every day, I feel refreshed and that I'm taking care of myself when I do. I write again in the afternoon, or at least work on the computer answering emails, visiting the forum and checking out the co-op.

Sometimes, like yesterday, I have food slow cooking throughout the day and the aroma of that fills the house with the promise of a table laden with delicious food later in the day. There will usually only be the two of us eating simple food here at dinner time, but we feel like we have feasted. Yesterday's feast was a low fat and high fibre vegetable, beef and barley soup, made better because many of the vegetables and herbs came from our backyard. All of the rest of it was in the freezer and stockpile, so there was no trip to the shops for ingredients. If I didn't have something, like parsnips, I substituted something else, like home grown turnips. I used onions, a potato, celery, carrots, dried green peas (because I noticed half a cup full in the fridge), silverbeet, turnips, parsley and thyme. The stock was made from scratch, using beef bones, in the morning - giving me the slow cooking all day, and I added ½ kilo/1 pound of gravy beef when I added the barley. Just before serving, I made little herb dumplings. It was delicious. I made about five litres/quarts of soup for less than ten dollars and I have enough to serve for dinner over the weekend as well as some for the freezer for next week or the week after.

Dessert, after our bowl of soup, was homemade egg custard with stewed apples. I peeled two granny smith apples and sliced them finely, sprinkled them with a little butter, sugar and cinnamon and microwaved them for four minutes. In the meantime I made a custard using four eggs from our chooks - the yolks are a deep golden colour so the custard looks like a golden sun sitting in the bowl. Custards are simple - just whisk the eggs with one tablespoon of sugar and a teaspoon of good vanilla. In another container, heat 2 cups of milk to just under boiling point. Pour the hot milk into the eggs and whisk together. Place this mixture in a bowl, sitting in a container of boiling water in the oven. Slow cook on 160C/320F for about 25-30 minutes. Take it out of the oven when it is firm but still wobbly in the middle. If it overcooks and hardens, it changes consistency. It's still edible but won't be as lovely as a softer custard.

There is no escaping it - slow cooked food nourishes you throughout the day simply by the thought and smell of it, and then does its real magic when you place it on the table. This is not fancy, it's simple food that is fresh and wholesome and will do you more good than any pre-prepared food you'll buy. Food from your own hands, there is nothing like it. When you invite Hanno and I to dinner at your home, we'd be more than happy to sit down to a meal of homemade soup and a simple dessert or fruit. This is our kind of food - simple, economical, homegrown, or at least fresh, and straight from the heart.

I wandered out to Hanno's big shed yesterday afternoon looking for Alice's old trampoline bed.  I rarely go out there, it's Hanno's territory and while there are very precious things in there - like my ancient school case full of old report cards and photos, there are also some things I don't want to know about - like jars of screws, too many hammers and a vintage fan I should sell.  No sooner had I walked in there when Hanno called out: "What are you looking for?"  LOL  I told him and he came in and showed me that the bed was high up near the roof on a ledge he'd built to hold a couple of old beds and mattresses.  Okay, so I wasn't going to get Alice's old bed but I was in the shed so decided to look around.  I knew I was there for a reason, just as I walked behind the hay stack, there were two little beauties just waiting for me - two old green bottles - one is 1½ litres/quarts, the other is 2 litres/quarts.  I swooped them up and took them inside.

I love recycling containers of all sorts but glass containers are my main prize.  And these, both large bottles with good seals, will help me provide cold water and lemon and fruit cup cordial over the coming summer months.  The cork on the wine bottle has been jammed in the top for who knows how many years and is now easy to take out and replace, while it still seals well. I also recycle stoneware mustard jars, as well as glass jam jars to use for my own homemade jam. There are some authorities who say you should never reuse lids when preserving/canning, I do it all the time and have never had a problem.  I make sure the lid is in good condition, the little rubber seal on the underside of the lid is not perished and there is no rust nor dents.  After boiling in the waterbath, if that little seal is indented, that is a good indication that I can store that jam in my cupboard for the next year.  Most lids last about six batches of jam, and for me, that's about six years of good use before I have to think about binning the jar. But if I find a replacement lid, that jar can go on indefinitely.  Uses for old jam jars.

And just a little tip, when you store biscuits in a jar, use the jars with the flip down metal catch - they're often French or Italian jars that can be bought fairly cheaply, or recycled if you buy the right product.  You can see that type of jar about, just to the left of the Thomas flask. I've found over the years if you use a screw cap, often the screw cap won't be secured properly and you won't know it until you go to get a biscuit for your morning tea and the lid isn't screwed on tightly.  The biscuits are stale.  Having the flip down catch, makes it perfectly clear that the lid is on or off, and you will save your biscuits every time.

I'm sure many of you are already recycling as much as you can but for those who are new to this, maximise your chances of success.  It's no use recycling anything if you don't use it.  Set up a cupboard to put all your recycled materials; clean everything properly, let them dry and add it all to your cupboard.  That cupboard will be your reminder to use a recycled container rather than buying something new.  When I got rid of my dishwasher, Hanno put in two shelves and that is where I hold most of my storage jars and bottles.

I know that recycling plastic is a great thing to do but I don't like recycling plastic that we'll use for food or drinks - even if it's food quality.  I have used recycled food quality plastic in the past, and still use a limited amount, but there is so much conflicting information regarding the leeching of toxins from plastics, I've decided to stay away from it until the scientists have a more definitive answer.  You can check what the symbols on plastics mean here.

 That is powerful stuff, but again, be very careful recycling plastic for food or drinks.

There are many different things you can recycle and by doing that you're helping with a huge international problem.  We've all heard about the floating rubbish in our oceans and we should all make a conscious decision to do what we can, and then follow up that decision with positive action.  I would love you to tell me how and what you recycle.  I am always looking for ways to improve what I'm doing and am interested in learning as much as I can.

ADDITIONAL READING

I have been nominated as one of Australia's top 50 women bloggers by Kidspot.com. I'll let them explain their list, this is from their email:

Kidspot editors have been poring over all the fantastic blogs created by Australian women and nominated yours as one of Kidspot's Top 50. This wasn't an easy job! We wanted to select what we thought were the very best blogs for our readers, based on the quality of content, ability to connect with readers, knowledge of subject area and dedication to regular posting. It's been really tough whittling down the quality blogs to just 50 and we know how many others are out there doing a great job.

Kidspot wants our readers to discover the very best the online world has to offer. As avid consumers of digital media, we know how much great material is out there, but busy mums and mums-to-be may not have had the time to stumble around the worldwide web - so we did it for them, offering them an edited choice of the best 50 blogs written by Australian women! Kidspot believes the more time women spend reading great blogs online, the more chance they will dedicate more time to consuming their media needs on the internet. What's more, blogs are a powerful platform for women - not just mothers - to have a voice, and the louder that voice is, the more we can all rejoice.

If you get anything from my blog I hope you'll take the time to vote for me. You can cast your vote by clicking here or on the Kidspot button in the side bar. One vote per IP and you don't have to sign up for anything to vote. While you're there, check out some of the other blogs on the list. There should be some good ones.

Thanks everyone.

Let's continue on the theme of career Homemakers today because there is work to be done.  We need to form a strategy.  The common problem that seems to crop up with many is when friends and family criticise our choice to work at home.  I really don't get this. I think some of it stems from not understanding the work of a homemaker and part of it from a conformist mentality.  When everyone conforms to the group dynamic, it validates their choices.  When someone doesn't conform, it creates doubt and suspicion.  And although homemaking might sound like the most harmless of careers, it's a radical choice now and not everyone will be comfortable with this home revolution. We need to work together to help change these outdated attitudes so that not only do we work at home with the support of family and friends but we also open up the option of a homemaking career for younger people who, right now, might not even know it's an intelligent and important option.

As you age, confidence fills every atom of your being.  Well, it has for me. I've always been a confident person but now I'm older I just expect many people to have differing opinions and beliefs and when I'm made aware of how different I am to many of my contempories, I just shrug and get on with it - I expect it.  And that might be the key to this - expect that people won't understand and when they tell you that, it's not a shock and you can talk to them about your choice in a rational way.  Don't be hurt by what others say to you on this topic.  For some reason, some people who would never think of insulting or hurting you with a comment about how they don't like your new hair style, think it's perfectly okay to tell you they don't like the way you've chosen to spend your days.  They just don't think it will offend or upset you, and if they do, you don't want them as friends.  Walk away.

I think it would be helpful to think carefully about your reasons for wanting to be a homemaker  and then write it all down.  Include all the positive benefits like debt reduction, healthy food, family support, being greener and reducing stress in your life so that you're clear in your mind about your own particular reasons.  When this topic comes up, say that you know this way of living is the best for you and your family and explain your list in a positive and self confident way.  Be prepared to talk about your decision but don't go on about it too much.  If someone won't accept your choice, then just end the conversation with something like: "You might not understand why I need to do this but I'd appreciate your support."  During the course of your conversations with friends, tell them about something that you're enjoying at the moment, talk about your normal everyday activities - particularly those that might seem quaint or outdated.  Tell them about your bread and soap making and how everyone appreciates your skills.  Show them your knitting and sewing.  Demonstrate your life in gentle ways.  Be your own best advertisement.

Homemaking has been looked down upon for decades.  This is not going to change overnight.  But if we all develop a strategy to talk about our work in a way they highlights the significance of it, if we show, by example, that being a homemaker makes us content, if we reskill ourselves for a productive future, if we guide our families with grace and confidence and if we share our experiences in a thoughtful way then we'll gain some of the support we all hope for and validate our choice to be what we are.

I have just finished reading Radical Homemakers by Shannon Hayes, which was kindly lent to me by my friend and fellow radical homemaker, Sonya, from Permaculture Pathways. I enjoyed the book, and although I was radicalised many years ago and am already doing much of what the book is about, I did get a strong message from it - we need to stand up, be proud of our lives and talk to others about how we live and why we live this way. We need to develop small communities of like minded souls so that what we are doing becomes a common way of being. If we all do that, hopefully those small communities become bigger and young people will learn that having one partner stay at home to keep house, raise children, shop wisely and manage the income, is a valid, significant and acceptable way of living. And not to leave anyone out of this revolutionary equation, those single people, the divorced, widowed and never married out there who work a paid job and who live as simply as they can while they do it, they need to spread their message too. We all need to be role models and show that living a simpler life brings much more than a clean home, connected children, nutritious food and no debt; it brings contentment and enrichment with it, and it is a career.

I have had three careers - I was a nurse, a writer and now I'm a homemaker/housewife. Writing that sentence has highlighted to me just one of the hurdles we face - that of language. When I was a nurse and a writer, everyone knew what those terms meant; with homemaker or housewife they don't. Homemaker is more an American term than an Australian one, and housewife is old fashioned and implies that everyone is married. We need to coin a term that accurately describes this work we do and we need to realise that even though work at home is unpaid work, it has value and it contributes to our countries wealth. I really dislike those terms that make light of our work - domestic goddess, home engineer etc, we need something substantial that describes, in general terms, what we actually do. I do like the term homemaker because it could mean just about anything that is done at home, but I also like home worker.

We all need to help change the perception that happiness is gained by buying it, that economies should grow at the expense of their people and that stepping back from the mainstream idea of buying more than we need, with money we don't have, is a hippy fantasy. And on the more positive side, we need to show our younger people that living this way is empowering, engaging and revolutionary. At the moment young people see staying at home as a drudgery. They have to clean and cook, look after children, and sometimes frail parents, and when the only knowledge you have of those tasks is what is seen on TV or advertising, you start to understand what a negative perception there is in the community about working at home.

We have to show that working at home gives us freedoms that paid work rarely offers. Imagine your first day at a paid job. You're given a range of tasks to do, a time limit in which to do them and standards to meet. All the time someone is watching you, making sure you do everything according to their plan. Now imagine your first day in your new home. You have already talked about your values and needs with your partner, so you set about setting up routines and learning new skills that will support your visions. The sky is the limit. You may do your work to your own rhythm and to whatever standard you set yourself.

You start taking control of your home - this is not a place where you just spend time waiting for your partner to return home. This, my friends, is a work in progress, a place that you want to spend time in, you want to make beautiful, safe and comfortable. You want to create a home that will nurture those who live there and that provides a warm and welcoming feeling to those who visit. You decide on a plan that will see you use your home and the land it sits on to help you live. You decide to grow organic vegetables and fruit in the backyard, get a few chickens, make a worm farm, or keep bees. You want to live an environmentally sound life, to eat organic food, or at the very least, the freshest food you can. You decide to learn as much as possible to cut the cost of living in this healthier and organic way so you set about learning how to make soap, laundry powder, bread, jams, relishes, sauces, and pasta. You start mending torn clothes and household linens, then progress to making gifts and simple clothes for the children, you start knitting and crocheting with natural fibres. In short, you take your new life as the positive empowering career it is and run with it. You make the most of what you have and you reduce your impact on your environment while doing it.

Sure, I agree, no one wants to clean toilets or dirty nappies/diapers, but look at the alternative. Do you want to use a dirty toilet or have your baby unhappy and uncomfortable? Every job has parts that we don't like doing, life is not always about what we want to do. We need to step up to all our tasks - enjoyable and not so enjoyable, just do them and then get back to the rest of it.

I have already seen changes happening. More people are cooking and gardening now than in the past. There has been a revival in home crafts, sewing and knitting. More people are understanding that debt is a life sapping burden and working actively to paid of their debts. Many beneficial things are happening, but we need to drive this along and we need to talk about our lives in a positive way to show others that working in our homes helps build good lives. That might be evident to us but to the general population, it isn't. Let's start talking about the happiness that lies waiting when we live this way and let's show, by example, that housework rewards us with homes we want to spend time in. Stop talking about housework as if it's the last thing you'd want to spend your time on, discover the good in what you do and highlight it. Let's start supporting other women and men in the work they do, no matter what it is, unpaid or paid. We can change things if we start with our own front door and work our way out. Gentle reminders about our way of life, speaking up when we heard someone complaining about housework, writing about this on our blogs, all these things will help make a difference. All it takes is that a lot of us start doing it.

I am doing a soap making class at my neighbourhood centre next month and I'm continuing with my frugal home workshops but I'm also going to think about how I can engage with the young people at our Flexischool and talk with them about this. What will you do? Do you have any great ideas that we could all use to help show that housework is not only radical, empowering and enjoyable, it is also a career? If so, please share.

It's been over a month now with Sharon first admitted to acute intensive care, then long term intensive care, much of it spent intubated with a  machine breathing for her, but now she is recovering.  She is spending some time out of bed and has written me a couple of emails.  She was really touched by the outpouring of love and good wishes here and I'm sure that helped her recovery a tiny bit.

We have to make sure she is completely well before she can even think of returning here, but I knew you'd all want to know that she is getting better every day and her family is smiling again.

I have a couple of little things for you this morning.  First is a new (to me) blog that I think is very charming and interesting.  I'm on the look out for baby related sewing and I hit the jackpot here.  I really like her work.  So when you have a bit of time, visit Amanda @ Amanda Brooke and have a look around.  It's a delightful read.

I found this video and lyrics last week and have watched and read it every day since then.  I hope you enjoy it too.  I've included the lyrics below incase your computer is too slow for videos.  

If you are at first lonely, be patient.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend doing something you love that will refresh you for the week to come.  Thank you for your visits this week, I'll see you again next week.  Take care of yourself.

I rarely give up on anything.  I like to think that when a difficult household task presents itself,  I step up and work out ways around the problem.  Eventually I get things done.  Nothing should be too difficult.  Enter the sour dough loaf.  Grrrrrrr.  Over the years I have tried to make good sourdough.  I've made sourdough, but none of it is what I would call good.  If I get the taste right, the texture is not good.  If the texture is great, the loaf looks like a science project.  When I bought the artisan bread in five minutes book and used that recipe and method, I didn't like the taste at all.

I am fortunate to be part of my blog neighbourhood.  Recently one of my blog neighbours sent me a sourdough starter.  His name is Henry.  Henry has been producing good bread and developing in flavour for a number of years.  I renamed Henry, Martha, daughter of Henry, and have been carefully tending her since she arrived. 

Yesterday I made my first loaf using some of Martha - I was aiming for a sandwich loaf similar to the one produced in a bakery near here. I'll let the pictures tell the story.

As soon as I saw the texture of the bread, I knew I hadn't left it rise long enough.  I'll fix that today.  I also cut it the wrong way, again, I'll fix that.  And to be honest, we did eat the bread; the taste was good but the texture was a bit rubbery and dense.  So I'm guessing the starter is giving me the taste we want, I just have to work on my times, and I need to start the loaf earlier than my regular bread.  I also need to read more about hydration rates and I must be more accurate with weights. It's definitely given me a lot to think about, and that's not a bad thing.

I would like to make a loaf like this.  We are having Hanno's 70th birthday next month and I'd like to have a few of these loaves sitting on the table for everyone to enjoy.  I think I'll go back to making the sourdough in my cast iron pot, instead of the regular bread tin for now.  I WILL master this.  Stay tuned, but don't hold your breath.

Thank you so much for your good wishes for Kerry, Sunny and the baby.  We, and they, appreciate everyone of them. 

It's been a while since I wrote about money and how to hold on to it. The new baby has refocused my mind on this topic because Kerry and Sunny will be saving for their home and Hanno and I will have a few extra expenses because we want to help provide for the baby.  We are on a limited budget, Hanno is on a pension while I still earn a small amount from my writing and the advertising on the blog and forum.  We have no debt, we have money in the bank but we have no superannuation/retirement plan/pension scheme to rely on.  We hope to live at least another 20 or 30 years so what we have right now is it for us, we need to be as frugal as we can be.

Self reliance has helped us get to the place we are right now.  We home produce a lot of our own needs and spend money only on raw materials and what we can't produce ourselves.  This has worked really well for us and it's very revealing how much money can be saved when you change your mindset to "thrifty" and you work for the benefit of your own well being and not to impress the neighbours or work mates.  The key to this isn't about how much money you earn but how much you save.  Imagine two people working the same job with the same amount of children and expenses.  If one worker spends their money buying everything they need, as well as what they want, they'll be existing from week to week, just focusing on the next payday.  If the other worker budgets, spends only on what is necessary, buys second hand when they can, recycles and reuses, knits, sews, mends, cooks and bakes, that worker will have money saved at the end of the pay period. So every week that goes by, the first worker comes out even or behind, the second worker will have something saved most weeks.  And I have to add that the second worker will probably also have the satisfaction of self reliance and the knowledge that their thrifty mindset is working for the family and not against it.

I hope we can all be that second worker.  

If you're both working you will have more expenses but you also have the capacity to save more.  It makes sense to have one person managing the money - that person should be the one who does it best.  Whoever is managing the money should do up a budget, ask their partner to help check out grocery bargains, write up the shopping list and meal plans; but you can both shop together.   If you have children, take turns at the shopping - always with a shopping list - so that you both understand grocery prices and both have a chance to save with your prudent and careful shopping. It is better to shop without young children, you need to be focused. If you are the one who is managing everything, you should be prepared to give a summary of your combined finances every month.  This will not only keep you on track, it will help your partner understand where the money is going and how much is being saved, or paid off the mortgage.  

If your partner is out working and you  are home raising children then it is your partner's job to earn money and your job to save money.  You will manage the money, actively look for ways to save, think carefully about your grocery shopping and look for bargains.  Try to work out a system where your partner looks after the children while you shop.  Your weekly grocery money is important to you, it's a lot of money to spend each week and you need to do it carefully.  After the shopping is done, you'll need to work out a system where you manage your food so that it is eaten as fresh as possible and it is stored in such a way that none of it is wasted.  It is estimated that about thirty percent of food bought for family homes is wasted.  That's like taking your weekly grocery money and throwing thirty percent of it in the rubbish bin!  That won't happen with any of us, we will be careful and will manage our money and our food mindfully.

If you're working for a living, or your partner is, then you are selling your life hours for money.  I calculated a little while ago that each year has only 8736 hours in it, giving us, if we live to be 80 years of age, just under 700000 hours in an entire lifetime.  When you think that you only have 168 hours in a week, and you sleep about 50 of them, then you have to be sure that life hours you sell must give you the best value.  Wasting money or hours cheats you of your life.  Work on a budget that will help you use your money in the best way possible.  And don't be caught up with fashion or the unrealistic expectations of children, family members, neighbours or friends.  Plan your spending with your partner and both work towards the good of the family.

Teach your children well.  Expect them to contribute to the welfare of the family by doing chores, keeping their room tidy and looking after their clothes, books and toys.  You won't teach them anything with over indulgence.  The only thing children learn when you give them more than they need is to how to take.  Have faith in your kids.  They will get more out of helping and knowing they're an important part of a happy family than just about anything else.  And their reward for this participation?  More time with you, of course.  Small children want to have time with their parents - it shows them how much they're valued and builds their self esteem.

I won't go into the ins and outs of budgeting with you now, I have many posts on budgeting and living well on less here.   We are all different, we all have different needs but we all have to conserve our life hours for real living.  Examine your life, think about what you want, talk about that with your partner and together make a plan to work towards it.  I hope that plan is a generous mix of sold work hours and work you do at home producing as much as you can for yourselves.  That is what Hanno and I have done and it has given us a life like no other.  I wish the same for you.

This post will give me more joy to write than anything else I could think of today.  I told you  there are a few exciting things happening here at the moment, well, I am now able to tell you the most exciting one of them.  Our son Kerry and his beautiful partner Sunny are having a baby!  Hanno and I will be grandparents in late March.  I can barely believe my eyes when I read what I have just written.

This wasn't planned but it's welcomed wholeheartedly by all of us.  Both Kerry and Sunny are hard workers and now that they have a baby to love and care for, they've decided it's time to buy an apartment together.  Sunny is going home to Korea to tell her family and when she comes back again, the search will start to find their first home together.  We are all so excited!  My knitting has taken on a life of its own and when I think of all the projects I could start, my head spins. 

This is one moment in my life when I feel as full as I could be.  I'm full of hope, love, anticipation, joy, generosity and determination.  Now, more than ever, I know that the way we live is preparing for this new life. I hope that when it comes to be my time to die, the world is more like the one I was born into and less like the one I grew up in.  We all owe that to our children and our grandchildren.

I'll stop writing now, I've already gone overboard because only these words matter today: Our son Kerry and his beautiful partner Sunny are having a baby!