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It's cold (for here) and raining.  I just filled a bowl with old bread, a sprinkling of milk powder and warm water and took this most prized of all treats to the chook house.  I'm not letting them free-range today.  It's too wet, they walk around in the coldness like dumb clucks and I worry they might catch cold.  Of course, they never do, but that doesn't stop me.

I brought my crocs out and transferred my feet from the warm toastiness of my woolen slippers to the harsh reality of cold hard plastic and walked into the backyard.  In the coop, it's sheltered and dry, I emptied the bread into their bowl and watched them devoured it all in record time.  Then realised they had no feed in their hopper.  So back to the verandah for a bucket full of their feed; while I walked away I could hear the hopper lid open and close several times.  They knew I'd checked the hopper and that it should be full and couldn't work out why standing on the step at the front didn't bring them food.  It didn't take me long to fill it for them and for a line to form.
This is Anne Shirley, our New Hampshire chook, standing on the step that opens the hopper.  When there is no one on the step, the hopper remains closed.

Two of our little ladies - Germaine and Mary - are broody and have been sitting on imaginary eggs for about a week. When I collect the eggs each day I pick them up and make them go to over to have something to eat and drink.  Germaine really hates this and fluffs herself up trying to scare me off.  But I'm a mean old bird myself and don't get put off.  ;- )

I put in some extra hay for them to sit on during this cold and wet day.  They're all warm and dry and their bellies are full.  That's the best I can do for them today.

I hope you are having a good weekend and that you're warm and dry and have a full belly.
From last week's postal room in outback Australia to a music room on the Isle of Skye.  This blog covers all areas.  I really liked reading this because it reminded me of my own mother who studied classical piano at the Conservatorium of Music in Sydney when she was young.  Today's work place is Ann's. I'm sure you'll enjoy her story.

Ann writes:
"This is my Music Room here in the small village of Scullamus on the Isle of Skye, a western isle off Scotland UK.
 
I teach here for three days every week, and enjoy the peace and quiet and slow pace of life.  I also travel away to judge singing competitions and give masterclasses, but I can never wait to get back to my own piano and home.  I  was a voice professor at the Junior Royal Academy of Music in London for 18 years and the fast life almost killed me off!
 
 
You can see the bird tables hanging just outside the window, and it is amazing how they sit there and cock their heads and listen to the singing - I always wonder what they think! I have a daughter who is also a singing teacher and two beautiful grandchildren of 7 and 3. We are a musical family, but being professionals the children never get 'pushed' - we know how hard the life of a musician is!


I have over 36 pupils here on Skye, from 6 years old to 70 years old, and we give concerts, do full show productions and we even toured giving concerts in Vienna in 2006 and 2008. In the photo you can see the racks of music, and the table for the dreaded theory! Mostly I love watching the confidence growing in them as they become better and better.  I have even persuaded my ladies of a certain age to take exams!!  I have a beautiful old garden with plum trees and lilac bushes, and two raised beds with a few salads and veggies, but I do not have the time for much more.  You can find me at http://singinginparadise.blogspot.com/, but I realize that reading about a classical singing teacher may not interest everyone! I love Rhonda's blog and have followed for a number of years - Oh that I could retire - or at least slow down enough to bake and garden.  Maybe when I am 70!"
This is a continuation of yesterday post on living within a "simple life" framework.  The areas we're focusing on today are:
  • being green
  • housework
  • the work we do
BEING GREEN
This can be quite challenging for many of us.  It requires that we change our habits and often they are habits of a lifetime.  When you live a greener life you can get rid of as many chemicals in your home, which include chemicals you clean with, it may include giving up smoking, it will include disposing of disposables, for some it will mean growing their own fruit and vegetables, for all of us it means consciously moving towards reducing the amount of rubbish that goes to landfill, and if you have a garden, maybe starting composting or worm farming.

Most of the elements in this category will impact on all the others because greening your life will give you fresher local food, will change the way you eat and shop and it will save you money.  Don't fall into the trap of buying your way to a greener future.  Many of the "green" products at the shops are very expensive, but most of them can be made at home for a fraction of the cost.  Learn how to make your own cleaners, my recipes are here; reduce, reuse and recycle as much as you can; stop buying over packaged products and complain at the store about the packaging.  It is only when manufacturers realise that we won't buy their otherwise good product because it's not packaged in a thoughtful way that they'll change it.  Never forget the power of your shopping dollar.  If you can, make your own yoghurt, soft cheese, bread and any other product you use frequently.  Not only will it be tastier and cheaper, you'll stop bringing home all that packaging.  Ask the family to help you cut back on electricity usage by switching off lights, computers, iPod and phone chargers and appliances.  Try to adjust the temperature you will turn on your air conditioning or heating.  Even a couple of degrees makes a big difference over the course of a year.   Take shorter showers, use a broom instead of the hose for cleaning up outside.  And don't look at any of these points in isolation.  Add up the savings over a year.  That is when the difference will be noticed.

HOUSEWORK
If you haven't already discovered the power of your own home, you are in for a delightful and beautiful shock.  Come closer and let me whisper this in your ear, because if everyone knows this, it will cause a revolution.  The work you do in your own home by creating a warm and secure place for yourself and your family to live in will enrich you and make you a different person. It saved me from a life of ridiculous spending and mindless acquisition, it slowed me down enough to allow me to see that there is beauty here, if I care to nurture and encourage it.  When I took the time to change my attitude towards my home, it not only gave me the energy to do housework and the strength to make the physical changes so our home better suited our family, it changed me in the process.  And it has been a beautiful change that I am grateful for every day.


Housework can slow you down and it helps if you concentrate on the job you're doing.  Don't think about what you'll be cooking for dinner, or what you'll be doing on the weekend.  Slowing down and being mindfull actually helps you get through the day.  And whether you're a first time mum or a retireee, take time out for yourself.  It may be a quick nap while the baby is asleep, a cup of tea and a book or a walk around the block.  It's important that you take the break.  Put YOU in the daily work equation, you need to nurture yourself and make sure that you are well enough to be the tower of strength that everyone expects you to be.

And remember, housework never ends, so don't try to finish it.  It will be there for you again tomorrow, so take your time, make changes that please you and try to develop a rhythm to your days.  Do the hard work in the morning and the easier things in the afternoon.  I see this work I do here in my home now as my job.  Some of it is outside and some inside, some of it difficult and some not so, some of it is repetitive and some new and exciting but all of it gives us the one place in this world that we are our true selves.  We feel secure here, we have made our home and our home has remade us.

THE WORK WE DO
Unless we're born into a wealthy family, all of us have to work at some stage to earn the money to buy what we need - be that a home, a car or our weekly groceries.  I hope you're not in a soul destroying job.  I hope that even if you don't like your job, you can find good bits in it, apart from the take home pay.  It's probably not the best time to be changing jobs with the economy the way it is, but when things improve, if you do really hate your job, look for something you like better.  Sometimes, even if you're doing the same type of work, the company will have less rigid policies, the workforce will be friendlier or the working environment will be healthier. You spend so much time at work, you should get as much of value out of it as you can.


Don't forget that your work can also help you live your chosen life.  You can take your lunch to work each day, take a bottle of water or a Thermos of good coffee, a book or knitting and make the most of your breaks.  And when you're doing the work you're being paid for, do your best, be respectful of your fellow workers and come home each day knowing that you used your skills in the most beneficial way and earned your money.  Trying to be your best and do your best will build self respect, and that is a powerful agent that will help you in other areas of your life.  The work you do outside your home is not a wedge you slice out of your life as if it doesn't matter.  It all matters, it's all part of your simple life and if it's not good, try to make it better.

As I wrote at the beginning of yesterday's post, this is a loose frame work of what many simple lives might look like.  The framework is flexible to accommodate all comers.  Shape your life to suit yourself, and don't expect it all to happen immediately.  Buying the organic or green products you can afford is fine, you don't have to be fully organic or green if you can't afford to be.  Try to make as much as you can at home, but if you can only make one thing, that's good too.  It all helps.  Doing what you can do at home is fabulous, you don't have to make every change possible right now - add things slowly, get used to them then add something else.  Don't get caught up with the name "simple".  It doesn't matter.  Just know what you want and go for it.  Don't be influenced by what others do.  Make your own way in your own time and you'll create a  simple life like no other, and when you do that, nothing else will be good enough for you.
I continue to have a sprinkling of emails every week asking for tips on how to start living a simpler life or how to continue once the first step has been taken. I thought it might be a helpful exercise to list some tasks and skills that might help you move towards simplicity or to remain on the path. But it's not that simple. We all live in different ways. Age, or the stage of life you're at, will determine more than anything else how you're living your life right now. For instance, those of you in your teens and early twenties will probably be living differently than those in their late twenties and early thirties who have young children. People in their late thirties and into their forties, whose children who have grown, will be different again. Those my age, will have different priorities and goals.

However, there is a a loose framework we can be guided by and that involves looking at:
  • the way we eat
  • shopping
  • living well on less
  • housework
  • being green
  • the work we do
You will find that when you look at all of these areas, as they relate directly to your own life, that each of them is linked to the others and the way you do one of them will impact on all the other areas.


THE WAY WE EAT
If you're not growing your own food, the best way to go is to eat seasonally. Eating what is in season will give you the freshest and possibly the cheapest food. It is really difficult to know what is in season when you're shopping at a mainstream supermarket because most of the fruit and vegetables will look fresh, even when they're not. Often their apples will be months old and just out of storage, tomatoes and eggs might be weeks old and if you're not a gardener yourself it's difficult to tell the signs to look for. If you can, shop at local markets and ask the seller when the produce was picked. If you can't do that, and supermarkets are your only option, do some research on what is in season in your area, and also be guided by price. When it's tomato season, they're cheaper. When berries or bananas are in season, they're cheaper. In winter, when cabbages and kale thrive, they're cheaper.

If you can, buy organic produce. If you can't buy all organic, buy what you can and be happy with that.

Cook from scratch. This will cut out all sorts of preservatives, artificial colourings and flavourings. If you don't cook at all, start with two simple recipes that you know will fit well into your lifestyle. When you're comfortable with them, add two more. You don't have to do all or nothing. Small steps towards your goal will work well.


SHOPPING
If you're still out there wandering through shops looking for things to buy, stop. Having more will not make you happier, more fulfilled or the envy of your friends. It will just use up the money you work hard for. You'd be wiser to use that money on paying off your debts.

Take control of your shopping, cut down on the times you go to the shops; if you shop weekly for groceries, go fortnightly instead. The more you're in the shops, the more you'll spend. Plan your menus, stockpile groceries and don't waste food. Cook from scratch - it is cheaper. Use your leftovers. Get rid of disposable products. Make a conscious decision not to use plastic bags or bottles. Instead of buying the numerous expensive commercial products in the cleaning aisle, buy white vinegar in bulk (at least two litres/quarts at a time), bicarb, laundry soap, borax, washing soda - also known as soda crystals, soda ash or calcium carbonate, and learn more about green cleaning. (I'll have more on this tomorrow.)


LIVING WELL ON LESS
Make up a budget and stick to it. Reading a sentence like that when I was a shopper would have made me cringe. I know better now. Now I know it's just a tool that helped me get my life back. I have some posts on budgeting and using the envelope system to help me organise myself. It's really liberating to get this part of your life under control and to be able to ignore advertising, turn your back on fashionable flim flam and be your true self.

When the penny drops and you realise that everything you buy will cost the hours of your life you spent earning that money, you will be ready go to the next level and work out a plan to get out of debt as quickly as possible. Being debt free means you're not beholding to any one or any bank. When you walk away from mindless consumerism and pay that last payment on your mortgage or credit cards, it will be one of the most memorable times of your life. On that day you will become a genuine independent and you'll live better and breathe easier because of it. Being debt free means that you don't have to make life decisions based on money. You can cut down your working hours if that is what you wish to do or you can continue working to save for travel or those things that are really important to you.

This post is getting to be quite long so I'll finish the rest of the list tomorrow.

What I hope I've demonstrated here is that moving to a simpler life means you take control of your own life and move into the driver's seat. Simple living is not passive. It requires that you make decisions and act on them. You will no longer be driven by what others have but by what you want and need instead. It usually involves more work but it is work that brings many rewards and is life affirming and enriching. But if you "get" it, if you can open up the elements of your life and really examine them, if you develop routines and a daily rhythm to this life work, if you can turn you back on what you're constantly told you want and want only what you need, then you will build a life like no other.

I think one of the most important, and certainly one of my most frequently used home skills, is bread making.  It is important in that it allows us to have a good wholesome lunch most days that, with the addition of our backyard salads, or some local cheese or even a scrape of Vegemite, is food fit for the most queenly of queens.  I have had the Artisan Bread in Five Minutes book for a few months now but I've been under-whelmed by it.  It gives what look to be good recipes but it doesn't inspire me to rush out and make them.  I will get back to sour doughs soon, I do believe they have an important place in my kitchen, but until this batch of yeast runs out and I perfect a good starter, I'm sticking to my yeasted recipe.


This recipe is really just an adjustment of my white bread one - it's four cups of flour, bubbling yeast, warm water, sugar and salt.  You could even leave out the sugar and salt if you wished, but they do add flavour.  Rye flour contains a small amount of gluten, therefore the bread doesn't rise as much as a white loaf does.  To help with the rising, I add half a cup of unbleached white baker's flour.  It gives the loaf a bit of a spring.

RECIPE
  • 2 teaspoons yeast - dissolve in a cup of warm water to which the brown sugar is added.  Let it froth up.
  • 1 tablespoon brown sugar.
  • about 2 cups of warm water.  This amount is approximate.  The amount of water to flour will change according to the humidity in the aim and the flour you use.  Add 1¾ cups first, mix, then add the last ¼ slowly.  You may even need more than this amount.  Just add it slowly.  When rye dough is too wet it becomes very sticky.
  • 3½ cups rye flour and ½ cup unbleached white baker's flour (strong flour)
  • 1 teaspoon salt.  Don't add the salt to the yeast water because the salt could kill the yeast.  Add it in with the flour.

Into your breadmaker, place 3½ cups rye flour, ½ cup unbleached white baker's flour and the salt.  When the yeast cup is frothy, add that and the rest of the water, slowly.  Turn on the machine and let it mix.  Feel the dough.  You always have to do this and you should learn what a good dough feels like.  If the dough feels too dry, or if there is still some dry flour in the bucket that hasn't mixed in, add a very small amount of water to help it mix in.  If the dough is too sticky you may need a small amount of additional flour. Feel it again and watch it mix.  The flour and water should come together well and not be sticking to the sides of the bucket.  You will notice as it kneads, the smoother the dough becomes.  What you want at the end is a smooth and elastic dough that springs back when you poke your finger in it.  BTW, this recipe is fine when made by hand as well.


When the timer tells you the dough cycle is finished, take the dough out and put it on a lightly floured clean bench. Knead it for a minute to put yourself into it and form it into the shape you like.  Rye dough is very easy to shape and it should hold itself free-form, so you don't have to use a bread tin, but you can if you want to.

 For every grain there is a seed that complements and enhances its flavour.  For rye, that seed is the caraway.  If you intend making rye bread, do yourself a favour and find some caraway seeds.  Brush the top of the dough with water and sprinkle on your seeds.  Place in a warm position to rise.  When the dough is the size you want, place it into your preheated very hot oven (as hot as your oven will go), then turn it down to about 190 - 200C / 375 - 390F.  Bake for about 20 minutes or until you smell the bread and it looks cooked.

I experimented with this flour for a week or so, starting of with half white and half rye.  The recipe above is the one we thought was the best.  However, like every recipe, I hope you experiment with it and suit it exactly to your taste.  I think recipes are just a starting point, they're there to show you how, and if you know what to look for, particularly when you're making bread, it should be quite easy for  you to adjust the recipe to suit yourself.

Happy baking everyone.
I am in a bit of a rush this morning so I'll just share some photos I took on the weekend as well as some I have taken recently but have not yet shown.  As you know we celebrated Shane's birthday at Shane and Sarndra's home on Sunday.



Sarndra is smiling brightly for me while the others are more interested in the delicious lunch they made for us.


When we finished our steak and salads, there was rich chocolate cake and lemon meringue pie to have with coffee and tea. Lemon pie recipe is here.  It was a wonderful afternoon.  The flat that Shane and Sarndra share in Brisbane reminds me of flats I shared with Hanno in our early marriage. There is furniture passed on by family members, as well as pieces from thrift shops, and not enough bench space for food preparation in the kitchen. But it's clean and tidy and there is a feeling of contentment there; they know small steps and sustainability are important and haven't gone into debt to get everything they want immediately.  They have each other, they're working hard on the rest, and they're very happy.  It makes me happy to be a part of it.


When we were ready to go home I took this photo of Shane and Kerry in the flat's cark park.  Right at the back, Shane has built a little vegetable and herb garden.  He's growing tomatoes, lettuce, strawberries and an assortment of herbs.  Naturally, the chefs have to check out the fresh produce.

Now I have some older photos taken in the past month.


First we have these two old boys who just happened to wander by late one afternoon.  I was sitting at my laptop, writing, I looked up to see two peacocks!  I think they two young brothers.  They hadn't yet grown their spectacular tail feathers, but they very beautiful nonetheless.


And this cute kookaburra was sitting on our back fence last week.  He looks young too.  That light patch on his wing is blue. He is one of the famous laughing kookaburras that sound like mad laughter when they call.  Kookaburras are in the kingfisher family.


I took this photo when my sister Tricia was staying with us last month.  She was making a beautiful quilt that, in this photo, she is piecing together - backing and wadding to the front.


And finally, we have Hanno making sandwiches with last week's rye bread.  Avocado and tomato on rye with a cup of black tea - a plain and honest lunch, but very tasty and available because of the work we both do.  I will be writing a post on making rye bread tomorrow.  I hope to see you again then.

I am looking forward to a bright and productive week for all of us.

Today we're in the Australian bush to see where Carole works.  With changing scenery like this most days, and mail coming in from all over the place, who could complain about going to work.

Carole writes:
"My job is as a country mail contractor for Australia Post,which means I deliver mail to the remote farmers. I think I may be one of a few people who wake up everyday and feel happy at the prospect of going to work,the only downside is the colour of the uniform,very flattering NOT!! 
This is the sorting room in our little post office.All the parcels are for me to sort into streets and which side of town they are to go to, I deliver these when I get back from the bush. The little pigeon holes are waiting to be filled with mail from the row of letters that await.Some days it is "where do I start"!! but of course there is a routine and rhythm otherwise it just does not work.The bundles of catalogues you can see are also delivered to the country households the towns people get theirs in the local paper.


The second picture is of why it is pure joy to go to work, while the roads are shocking,full of potholes and corrugations, the scenery is to die for. I go past this little waterfall each day, on my blog it shows it flooded. The road you can see is one of the better ones I drive on and yes my car is 4 wheel drive or I would not get to the farms. Lambing time and foaling time is the most joyful as we watch the little ones born and grow until we can't tell the mums from bubs anymore. The best part of my job is I can take my 89 year old Mum with me and she thrives on it all.The bumps at times make an interesting ooh and ahh time but all worth it.I am back home at lunch time and still have time to do other things."

Click here for Carole's blog.
I clearly remember that split second I became a mother.  Lying in a labour ward in Germany, in a hospital far, far away from my home, this tiny baby came into my life and changed me forever.  It is true to say that I was reborn on that day.  So now here we all are, with an ocean of water having flowed under a hundred bridges, celebrating Shane's thirtieth birthday.  I don't think I looked ahead much when I was younger but now as I look back I see a young woman who didn't have much of a clue, who stumbled along and learned from her mistakes and who hoped that everything would work out fine. It did.  I can say now with razor sharp conviction, that I couldn't be prouder of my sons.  I look at them and wonder, with the potential for so much to go wrong, how did they come to be so right.  Of course, that is a mothers love and pride talking but I'm sure all the parents here understand.


We will gather in Brisbane to celebrate with Shane and Sarndra on Sunday.  A simple lunch of homemade fresh food, with most people bringing something to contribute, lots of it gathered from backyard gardens, including Shane and Sarndra's, with all of us siting together around that symbol of hospitality and family, the kitchen table.  It's such an age old scene - a family gathered to celebrate an important milestone - sitting together, eating, drinking, talking, reconnecting and strengthening family ties.


Rituals such as this make families stronger.  They take time and thought but they are worth every ounce of effort you put into them.  Just as having a family sitting around a table for evening meals leads to a closeness that facilitates family love and communication, when children are older, the ties that bind are upheld and preserved by celebrating family rituals like birthdays, weddings, new babies and anniversaries.  Everyone can become as involved as they want to be.  They either come along and enjoy the get-together or they bring food or wine, or help set up and clean up.  All of it brings a family together for a common purpose.


Never let yourself be convinced that family celebrations don't matter.  It's easy to say we'll do something next year or we're too busy but when you do that you miss the chance to express love and caring and to show that of all the things you could be doing, this is THE most important.  That expression of love has real meaning - the face to face contact, the hugs and kisses, the helping, listening to family stories as the washing up is done and all the small things you can do in person, they are remembered and each year are built upon. 


Our celebrations are even more special now that we have two amazing women who have come into our family as our sons' partners.  We are learning their stories too, getting to know their families and are carefully piecing our families together.  This is important work, it is building a secure framework in which children will be born and will grow to continue these family traditions.  Strong family ties don't always happen naturally.  They need to be helped along and nurtured because without them we just become a group of people who happen to share the same name.  That's not good enough for me.  I want all the Mrs Hetzels and all the Mr Hetzels, and everyone we care for and love, to be seated around that big kitchen table celebrating all the good times together, because if we do that, we will be strong enough to withstand the bad times together.
I was quite overwhelmed by the response to my last post, both here in the comments and in emails.  Thank you all for your concern, love and support. I spent a lot of time thinking about this and I am now of the belief that the death of my friends is revealing to me that life must be really lived in each waking moment and to do anything less would be the greatest deprivation.  It is a valuable reminder as I move into my mid-60s and I am determined to make sure I don't waste too much time and to do my best and be my best as much as I can.  

It is not the custom in Australia to speak of our religious beliefs - it is generally a personal and private thing, and although I know there is a lot of interest in whether or not I'm a Christian, that is known to only my family and those closest to me.  As always, I honour the differing beliefs of those I know, including the many Christians here, but I will remain with my custom of not speaking of such things in public.

Please keep Sharon and her family in your thoughts and prayers. Sharon is still in intensive care, she now has a collapsed lung as well, so it's important that we send her our love and support.

While all this is going on, Hanno, the constant in my life, continues to work towards our combined well being by producing delicious organic food for our table.  He dug up another bucket full of potatoes and I got a few photos for you of how he prepares the garden bed for the next crop.



After the crops have been dug up and all weeds and debris removed, Hanno digs over the soil and makes a trench.  He then fills the trench with homemade compost.
When the trench is full of compost, he covers the compost with soil, and moves to the next trench.  He moves along the garden bed until it's full of compost trenches.  Then he waters them in and lets it all settle for a week or so before planting the next crop.

 As always, assistant gardener Alice, awaits instructions (or food).


And finally, but by no means least, today is my beautiful son Shane's 30th birthday.  I'll talk to him on the phone later today but we'll see him and his wife Sarndra at their home on Sunday where we'll celebrate this milestone with his brothers and the rest of the family. Shane has requested that I bring his favourites - lemon meringue pie and chocolate cake, so I'll be baking them on Saturday for Sunday's party.  Happy birthday Shane!  ♥ ♥ ♥
Please be warned that this is a dark and reflective post.  If you're feeling a bit sad yourself, you might want to skip this one.

Life has not been all that good lately.  While I have so much to be thankful for there have been things that have made me very sad and I have been questioning my mortality and how I fit into the overall scheme.  Bernadette's death was devastating and while it was expected, it shocked me and has made me go over the many conversations we had just prior to her death.  Tomorrow I will go to the funeral of another good friend.  Jack died in an horrific accident last week, the last person you would expect to died so suddenly, he was like a rock and a friend to many of the homeless people I deal with at my voluntary job.  In fact, that is how we met.  He was leading the St Vincent de Paul charity and we met because we had the same clients and could help each other.  Jack will have a police honour guard at his funeral.  He was a police inspector before his retirement.  I was talking to Jack last week, teasing him about how he didn't need a holiday, then two days later he died. 

It's so sudden.  We really don't know.  I know that's a cliché and I have thought about this before, but this time, it's really hit home, that me or anyone I love might not be here next week.  And what really amazes me is that life goes on just as before like nothing has happened!  I tell you it's been a real wake up for me.  I'm generally laid back but I have this feeling now that stays with me, I guess it's insecurity or uncertainty.  Whatever it is I don't like it, it wakes me in the middle of the night and in the silence of my bedroom, my mind races through a million scenarios; I sleep in stages and wake up exhausted.

The one thing that seems to help is to feel the permanence of my home.  With Hanno here working beside me, I feel steady, secure and safe but outside, well, when I'm out I feel that maybe I won't get home again.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not having panic attacks and I'm not fearful of dying, I feel uncertain and I'm questioning everything.  Nothing is predictable, in fact it's the opposite. I think I'm sailing on smooth seas, but I know now that's untrue.

I guess the transitory nature of life has been revealed to me close up and personal.  I want to get back to a feeling of security.  I don't want to deny the nature of life - I do know the only certainty we have is that we'll die, but I want to be comfortable with that knowledge again.  Like I was before.  Maybe this has hit me because I am getting older.  I can see things I never saw before, I no longer feel like that bullet-proof larrikin I was when I was 30 years younger.  I knew then, with unfailing certainty, that I could tempt fate, be reckless and walk on a razor's edge and that I would come out on the other side just as sure as sunrise.  Yep, I knew that then, but now I know different things.  Now I am lost in uncertainty.  Time has caught up with me.  

Tick tock.

Okay, so what do I know for sure.  I know Hanno, he is a constant.  Tick.  I am sure of the love of my family and friends. Tick. I know I love my home, it nurtures me and makes me strong enough for all that I do. Tick.  I love the work of my home, it validates who I am. Tick. I know that when I knit it connects me to all my ancestors, washing up does that too; gardening reconnects me to all that is natural in this world.  That warms my heart and helps me know that those activities, while seeming simple have power and significance. I know my home, and all the work we do here,  while helping us live the life we have chosen, also make us the people we are. We are guided by daily activities but we are shaped by them too. Tick.

Writing this has made me realise this is a stage of life.  Just as feeling immortal when you're 20 and thinking you can do anything in your 30, this is a stage I am going through to prepare me for what will come later.  It's preparing me for death.  Now, I don't think I will die soon (but I could), I'm very healthy, and I certainly want to live until I'm 90 or so.  We have longevity in our family so I hope that is my destiny.  But what this is doing is preparing me.  Life would not prepare us all in certain stages and desert us in others. So just as we are given that bravado when we're 30 so we develop the confidence to be our true selves and really live every day, this fear is sent to indicate mortality, to slow us down and make us think of probabilities. Eureka! I love being the age I am.  I still feel young and only know my age when I see myself in a mirror or I cannot walk up stairs like I used to.  But maybe the loss of physical strength is replaced by something like wisdom.

I have sorted out quite a few things by writing about them.  I hope these thoughts are not too personal to share with you; it is not my intention to alarm anyone.  I guess this is a very selfish post, one, maybe, that would have been better written in a more private space.  But now it's here and I'm not moving it.  Hopefully it will help others going through something similar who, like me, think they're losing it.  I'm pretty sure that by tomorrow as I get ready for Jack's funeral, I'll have hidden these feelings again and deal with the remnants of them in my dark and silent bedroom, or I'll talk it out with Hanno over morning tea on the verandah.  Or maybe I just need time - that general panacea of getting up in the morning and living through each day to reveal again the incredible beauty of it all.  Could time be the answer?  Is it that simple?

I'm happy to tell you that although Sharon is not out of the woods yet, she's showing some signs of improvement.  She's still in ICU, with all the bits and pieces attached to her, but it looks like she turned the corner.  Her family was overwhelmed at the outpouring of support and love for Sharon here on the blog.  You might have noticed that Sarah, her daughter, left us a note of thanks in with the comments.  Sharon's husband, Claude, sent a couple of emails yesterday to keep me up to date with her progress and to thank you all for your prayers and good wishes.  Please keep Sharon and her family in your thoughts during this period of recovery. 


Hanno and I kept ourselves busy during the past few days.  I never understand when retirees say they're bored and there's nothing to do.  We took a little trip in the car down to Ipswich, a city close to our State capital, last week.  I have to tell you that road from Brisbane to Ipswich is very scary.  It's narrow, curvy and has a lot of B double trucks speeding along.  I was pleased we came home along the back road with little traffic and a lot of beautiful scenery.  I sat there with my knitting as we ambled along, just gazing at the passing parade. Life moves slowly along the back roads, it's more to my pace. We passed through a little town called Toogoolawah on that backroad.  It's typical of small Australian country towns now in that it had a pub, a grocery store, newsagent, garage and a few antique shops and not much else.  But they did have an old movie theatre and in the great Australian style of Saturday night pictures, which we all used to call it, they showed The Prince of Persia and Marmaduke this Saturday night just gone.  The Prince of Persia could easily have been an old film from the 1940s, starring Victor Mature or Van Johnson, but it was a new film, with people I'd never heard of.  I'm sure everyone enjoyed it though - a treat for the whole family at the end of the week.


We always look for road side stalls to buy those vegetables and fruit that we don't grow ourselves.  Hanno found a little stall with reasonable pumpkins, and although their sign advertised Granny Smith apples for $2.99, he said they weren't worth buying.  That turned out to be good for us because when he went to the farmers market yesterday, he found a fairly local grower with superb Delicious, Pink Lady and Granny Smith apples and they were $1.99/kilo.  And, all picked in the last week.  We shared a very big Delicious apple, one bigger than any I have seen for years.  Hanno said the farmer told him he grows for Woolworths (a big grocery chain here) and they were too big for them.  They all have to be a regulation size, so these beauties were rejected.  I shouldn't complain, because we benefited from their short sightedness, but it's insane to pick fruit for size and not for flavour and freshness.


When we came home, we closed the gate and settled back in together here, in our home, growing, sewing, making, relaxing, knitting and living the good life.  I did some sweet baking to keep us going for our morning teas over the next week and last night I cooked curried prawns and rice for our dinner.


Yesterday afternoon I made a fleece coat for Alice.  I had some old fleece given to me by my DIL Cathy.  She had a throw-out a year or so ago and asked if I wanted to look through it.  I found a number of pieces that I've used for fund-raising aprons and bits and pieces here, and now Alice has a coat.  Now that she's old, she's not covered by hair as much as she was in the past and she's lost weight in the past year.  I'm sure she'll like wearing her coat at night while she sleeps.  I used a doubled over piece of fleece, cut the fabric after I drew the pattern with tailor's chalk, and used old cotton tapes to keep it on her.  It's simple but it looks like it keeps her warm, and I think I heard her whisper that she likes the stars.



It will be another busy and productive week for us here. Hanno found some good rye flour at the shop last week so I'll be making rye bread today.  Hopefully I'll have photos for you tomorrow. We have a lemon tree full of fruit waiting to be picked and juiced and Hanno has some seedlings to plant out.  I am hoping to do a couple of hours knitting today as I want to finish Hanno's jumper off before it's too late this year to wear it.  I've almost finished the front and just have the two sleeves to go.  I hope you have an interesting and productive week too.  If you have time, let me know what you're up to.

I wasn't going to post today but in a lightning flash, things change.

They say that behind every good man there is a good woman.  Well, behind me there is a good man and a good woman.  You all know Hanno, my faithful sidekick for the past 33 years, but there is also Sharon who is a wonderful lady living in New Mexico, who I have never met in person but I feel exceedingly close to.  Sharon introduced herself to me after I had been blogging for only a short time.  She told me she would help if I needed it.  Well, over the years she's helped me, been a wise adviser, and encouraged me all along the way.  She helped me develop the Simple Green Frugal Co-op, where she still does the roster for the writers and keeps an eye on the day-to-day happenings.  At the Down to Earth forum, where she is my co-administrator, she has been with me since I first started thinking of it and wondering if it would work.  Naturally, she said she'd be there to help if I went ahead with it.  It is true to say that online, Sharon is my right hand woman.  Through all of this we've kept in constant touch via email and now she knows my family and I know hers and I feel like I've been her friend for a long long time.

Sharon is very ill in hospital.  I just received an email from one of her daughters saying that Sharon was rushed to hospital on Wednesday in a very serious condition.  She is still in intensive care.  
I ask you all to send Sharon your prayers or positive thoughts.  She has a very close family, they are at her side and they need your thoughts now too.  Hopefully, Sarah, one of her daughters, will take the laptop to her when she is feeling better and she will see the outpouring of love for her.  I know that if we all think of Sharon and send her that positive energy from all around the world, she will feel it.  Thank you, friends. ♥
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I'm Rhonda Hetzel and I've been writing my Down to Earth blog since 2007. Although I write the occasional philosophical post, my main topics include home cooking, happiness and gardening as well as budgeting, baking, ageing, generosity, mending and handmade crafts. I hope you enjoy your time here.

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Popular posts last year

Making ginger beer from scratch

We had a nice supply of ginger beer going over Christmas. It's a delicious soft drink for young and old, although there is an alcoholic version that can be made with a slight variation on the recipe. Ginger beer is a naturally fermented drink that is easy to make - with ginger beer you make a starter called a ginger beer plant and after it has fermented, you add that to sweet water and lemon juice. Like sourdough, it must ferment to give it that sharp fizz. To make a ginger beer plant you'll need ginger - either the powdered dry variety or fresh ginger, sugar, rainwater or tap water that has stood for 24 hours to allow the chlorine to evaporate off. You'll also need clean plastic bottles that have been scrubbed with soap, hot water and a bottle brush and then rinsed with hot water. I never sterilise my bottles and I haven't had any problems. If you intend to keep the ginger beer for a long time, I'd suggest you sterilise your bottles. MAKING THE STARTER In a...
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What is the role of the homemaker in later years?

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Trending Articles

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Making ginger beer from scratch

We had a nice supply of ginger beer going over Christmas. It's a delicious soft drink for young and old, although there is an alcoholic version that can be made with a slight variation on the recipe. Ginger beer is a naturally fermented drink that is easy to make - with ginger beer you make a starter called a ginger beer plant and after it has fermented, you add that to sweet water and lemon juice. Like sourdough, it must ferment to give it that sharp fizz. To make a ginger beer plant you'll need ginger - either the powdered dry variety or fresh ginger, sugar, rainwater or tap water that has stood for 24 hours to allow the chlorine to evaporate off. You'll also need clean plastic bottles that have been scrubbed with soap, hot water and a bottle brush and then rinsed with hot water. I never sterilise my bottles and I haven't had any problems. If you intend to keep the ginger beer for a long time, I'd suggest you sterilise your bottles. MAKING THE STARTER In a...
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